FIc (Oops)
Nov. 21st, 2008 09:51 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lls_mutantSo, yeah, I've been writing NaNoWriMo, but this one had to get out of me.
Title: Ten Good Things Happen to Felix Gaeta
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
lls_mutant
Rating: PG-13
Summary: See the title.
Length: about 3000 words
Pairing: Gaeta/Hoshi, with reference to Gaeta/Baltar
Spoilers: Through 4x10
Notes: Written fordaybreak777's "Gaeta's Good Things Challenge"
1. A Hug
"You don't have to do this," Helo insists.
"I really don't mind," Felix says. True, babysitting isn't his first choice of activities in normal times, but these aren't normal times and it beats being around people. At least Hera doesn't pretend she's not staring at him. "Besides," he says bitterly, "it's nice to feel useful."
Helo opens his mouth to argue, and then closes it again resignedly. "Right," he says, rather than go down that path. "We won't be out too long."
"Thanks, Gaeta," Sharon says, and he smiles at them and gestures imperiously from his chair. But when the door clangs, he stares at Hera and wonders why the hell he offered to do this. He's not good with kids.
Hera's already asked the obligatory "why do you only have one leg?", and was satisfied with his answer of "because I lost the other." She watches him for a minute, and then turns back to her coloring. Felix rests his chin on his hand and closes his eyes.
He's only there for a minute when a book is dumped in his lap. When he opens his eyes he sees an old, worn tech manual with lots of diagrams, and Hera clutching her doll. "Read," she demands.
"You want me to read this?" he asks incredulously.
Hera nods.
Well, it beats butterfly princesses and fairy friends, so he obligingly opens the manual. Hera climbs up and wedges herself in between his good leg and the side of the chair, and he begins to read. As he does, Hera interrupts him and recites descriptions of the various machines, telling him that she's heard this hundreds of times already. But it's funny to listen to her little voice talk about laminar flow and combustion chambers, so they keep going.
Hera's hair is curly, like his. He strokes it softly as they read, and the thought flitters through his mind that they're both half a human. Fortunately, his brain kicks in before his mouth can say it. Hera's delighted with him, though, and they're still sitting there reading when Helo and Sharon return.
"She made you read the whole thing, didn't she?" Helo asks suspiciously.
"Read it again, Daddy?" Hera asks, sliding off the chair and holding it up to Helo.
"I think that's my cue to leave." Felix reaches for his crutches.
"Say goodnight to Felix," Sharon orders Hera.
"Good night," Hera says, and then comes over and hugs him. Fortunately he's still sitting, or it would have knocked him off balance. "Have a good sleep," she tells him gleefully.
Felix hugs her back. "You too."
2. A Connection
Whenever they're in orbit, Felix feels a bit useless. Especially now, when he has no idea where- or if- they're going anywhere now that Earth's turned out to be inhabitable. He sits at his console, watching the Dradis blink and wondering if it would be really obvious if he pulled up a game on the computer.
Hoshi appears beside him. "Do you have the algorithm for the water distribution system?" he asks.
For a moment, Felix can't speak, because when Hoshi puts a hand on his shoulder something sparks through him, warm and rusty. "Yeah," he says finally, hoping his voice isn't coming out as a croak. "Let me pull it up for you." He's conscious of the way his fingers dance over the keyboard.
He hasn't felt like this in a long time, not since those first heady days on New Caprica. But Gaius broke his heart- he can admit that now- and even when he was watching Helo, he knew it was because Helo was safe. This isn't safe, but it's not dangerous either. The program springs to life before him, and he moves his chair aside so Hoshi can see it.
Hoshi takes rapid notes on his pad. He doesn't seem to be looking at Felix, but Felix is very aware of their proximity. But he looks down at what's left of his leg and his stomach twists, because that's going to settle that.
Hoshi stands up from the computer. "Great. Thank you."
"You're welcome," Felix says.
Hoshi doesn't leave. Instead, he shifts uncomfortably. "Haven't seen you around much off duty," he says.
"Yeah, well." Felix shrugs.
"I'd like to."
That direct statement makes Felix look up, and when he does he sees Hoshi watching him. And with him sitting there at his console and Hoshi standing, he's reminded of that moment when they'd reached Earth, and just for a moment, he'd been-
"Listen," Hoshi says, breaking off his train of thought, "I was wondering. Would you like to go to Joe's and get a drink after this shift?"
Felix smiles. "Sure," he says. "I'd like that a lot."
Hoshi bursts into a smile. "Great," he says. "I'll see you after."
Felix watches him walk away. It's only then that he notices that Dee is the Communications Officer on shift, and she's giving a thumbs up. Not to him, but to Hoshi.
Hoshi leaves the CIC, and Felix can't help the grin that spreads across his face.
3. An Advocate
The meeting in the conference room isn't supposed to start for ten minutes, but Felix still hasn't figured out how long it takes him to get places on the ship with his crutches, so he's early. He begins to open the door and is about to shove it open when he hears the voices inside.
"You're not the President," Adama says, "and I don't appreciate you telling me how to run my crew."
"I am not telling you how to run your crew." Felix immediately recognizes Tom Zarek's voice and smiles. "I am just saying that it's ridiculous that you've overlooked him for so long."
There's no response, but Felix can see the you'd better shut up now look on Adama's face, even if he can't physically see the man. But Tom ignores it and continues on.
"He passed information that got us all off of New Caprica. He's navigated this entire course to Earth. He calculates every jump and got us here safely, and it's not his fault the place is such a shithole. He's had to take orders from a woman who, from what I heard, tried to kill him even after she knew he was innocent. He constantly works double shifts, he's in the lab all the time, and for crying out loud, he returned to work four days after having his leg amputated! What more do you need for this kid to get a promotion?"
"Not stabbing prisoners with a pen would be a start," Adama says. He launches into more of an explanation, but Felix closes the door gently and navigates to another room, needing to sit down.
It's not that he hasn't been promoted. He's seethed over that, but he's also made his mistakes and can accept it. It's not that Adama's arguing about it. It's that for once, someone actually stuck up for him. Someone actually said that he was worth fighting for, and then went ahead and did it. Someone in the Fleet actually gave a shit.
He bows his head, and he's glad that no one's in here to see him right now. And although his throat is closed and his eyes are suspiciously wet, he smiles.
4. A Kiss
It's the third time in as many days that they've gone to Joe's together. Hoshi is easy to talk to, and they have a lot in common. Not just their jobs, but they've seen a lot of the same movies and have similar beliefs, and they seem to find the same things funny. Felix has enjoyed those drinks, and he's pretty sure Hoshi has, too.
Afterwards they walk through the halls, Hoshi setting his pace to match Felix's, but doing it in a way that seems casual. Natural. He's got his hands in his pockets and his eyes on Felix, and suddenly Felix desperately wants to get to their quarters because he knows what's coming and he wants it to happen.
One of the gods must be watching, because when Hoshi opens the door to the racks no one is in there. Felix smiles and sits down at the table. "I have another bottle," he suggests, "if you'd like another drink."
Hoshi smiles, and there's something nervous behind it. It's kind of adorable, especially since Felix feels the same way. "That sounds good," he agrees, and Felix stands up to get it. He likes the fact that Hoshi doesn't insist he sit, and he also likes the fact that Hoshi finds the glasses and brings them over.
"You know," Felix realizes once they're sitting with their glasses in front of them, "I don't even know your first name."
"Really? It's Lucas."
"Lucas." It feels strange to say it, just like it always feels strange when someone starts calling him Felix for the first time. But it's a good sort of strange.
Hoshi- Lucas- pulls out a deck of cards. "Want to play, Felix?" he asks, quirking his eyebrow up on the last word.
He's really asking something else, and Felix grins. "Do I ever."
Lucas deals and they begin playing, neither of them focused nearly as much on the cards as on each other. And when Lucas finally puts the cards down and leans over to kiss him, Felix is quite certain that something is going to go right for a change.
He's wrong, of course. Neither of them had wanted to presume so neither of them put the boots out, and the door clangs open. They snap back from each other as four other people enter the room, complaining about the meal they'd just eaten. But Lucas smiles at him and reaches out to touch his cheek, and Felix knows that this will be continued.
5. A Leg
Felix hates going to sickbay, but only because of what it means. He quite likes Cottle, and he's pretty sure Cottle likes him. It's only been a few weeks, but already he's sick and tired of therapy and exercises.
When Cottle sees him, he smiles. "There's some good news, Felix," he says.
Felix hoists himself up on the table. "There is, sir?"
"There was a heart attack over on the Prometheus," Cottle says.
"Doesn't sound like terribly good news to me," Felix mutters.
"It will. Unfortunately, the gentleman died. But Dr. Martin contacted me to let me know that he did have a prosthetic leg."
The words cut through the fog and the misery. "Sir?"
"Granted, demand for prosthetics isn't high in the Fleet," Cottle admitted, lighting up a cigarette. "But even if it was, you were at the top of the list to receive one. And it turns out it's even the correct leg. Custom fitted, but we can work around it."
Felix can't believe it. "A leg."
"Martin's sending it over this afternoon." Cottle smiled. "After we're done with your exercises, I think we need to take some measurements so I can get it fitted."
It's a moment of sheer impulse and completely unlike him, but this news is tantamount to when they reached Earth, at least for him. Felix hugs Doc Cottle, and when he lets go they're both laughing.
6. A Moment of Healing
Some god must have decided Felix had been tortured enough, because it turns out the man who'd died was almost exactly the same height as Felix. The new leg fits well enough, although it feels awkward and strange. Cottle assures him that it will improve.
He works with Cottle for two hours, and then he's on shift. They've left Earth, so there are jumps to plot and ships to refuel, and the shift is busy. Felix feels needed, and he feels competent. The CIC is far from the same, but when he's at his console he has a few moments where he can pretend that it is.
He meets Lucas after his shift for drinks at Joe's, and tonight they aren't alone. People come over, talking and laughing, and they're a part of a group. The racks are occupied when Felix gets back, but that's okay because Lucas had duty soon anyway.
He eases himself into bed, and suddenly, he realizes that he hasn't thought about Gaius Baltar all day. The name still sends shafts of pain through him when he thinks it, but the fact he hasn't thought it at all… well, that has to mean something, doesn't it?
He folds his arms behind his head and looks up at the ceiling above him. He doesn't believe the wounds will ever completely heal. Some wounds don't, after all. And he wonders if he should tell Lucas just what happened. Maybe someday, he decides, because even just thinking about it fills him with shame.
It's not much, that he didn't think of Gaius at all today. But it's something, and he'll take it.
7. A Promotion
"Mr. Gaeta," the Admiral says. "Please come in."
Adama is worn and haggard, and Felix can't blame him. There's enough unrest going on and enough to worry about… Gods knows he worries about it enough himself, and he doesn't have the entire Fleet hanging on him. Well, not like Adama does.
"Have a seat," Adama orders.
"Thank you, sir."
Adama sets aside whatever it is he's working on, and sits back in his chair. "I'm glad to see that Cottle found you a prosthetic."
"Yes, sir."
Adama looks like he wants to say something more, but isn't sure how to phrase it. Felix regards him evenly. He still likes Adama, still respects him, but when he looks at him he feels some echo of that betrayal that he feels when he thinks about Gaius. He wonders if it shows on his face.
Adama finally opens up the desk drawer and pulls out a small box. Felix's heart begins to pound, because he knows what that little box means and he's almost given up hope of ever seeing it.
"This has been a long time in coming," Adama says, passing the box over to Felix. "It's been brought to my attention that it's overdue, and it's time we remedied it. Congratulations, Captain Gaeta."
He salutes, and Felix salutes back. "Thank you, sir."
8. A Lover
"That was…" Felix closes his eyes and laughs at the ceiling. "That was amazing."
"I agree." Lucas props himself up on one elbow, smiling down at him. "You are amazing."
Felix flushes. He's only ever had two lovers before; Skulls and Baltar. Amazing isn't the word he'd use to describe himself in bed, but he's not going to complain. "Thank you," he says softly.
Lucas touches his face. "Any time," he says, his voice low and intimate.
He settles on the bed, wrapping an arm around Felix and arranging them both so they're vaguely comfortable in the narrow rack. Felix can't help smiling. It's not just the sex, although that certainly was enough to make anyone smile. What really is resonating in him is the way Lucas looks at him, the way he touches him. It's like he's whole again, because Lucas isn't just seeing the missing leg and the broken dreams, but the man that they belong to.
Lucas clears his throat. "Just so we're clear," he says suddenly, "you know that this isn't just a one-time thing for me, right? That it's not just a bit of fun?"
The echo of those words makes Felix close his eyes. "Yes," he says, pushing away when he'd heard almost the same words and the opposite sentiments. "It's not a one-time thing for me, either." He tightens his arm around Lucas's waist, and kisses his cheek. Lucas turns his head and their lips meet, and their bodies meld together again.
9. A Family
"Come on," Lucas says. "We're not going to Joe's tonight."
"We're not?" But Felix follows along, amused and game.
"We're not." Lucas leads him back to their racks. Felix smiles to himself, because hey- who doesn't smile at the thought of sex- but fortunately has the good sense to restrain himself from groping Lucas before they get there.
And it's a very good thing, because when Lucas opens the door there's a sign and people smiling, waiting for them. The sign says Congratualations, Captain Gaeta, and it's hung over a table with a small spread and a bottle of booze. Dee greets him with a hug and a kiss on the cheek, Cottle is clapping, and when Helo sets Hera down, she runs up and hugs him.
"You have two legs," she says. "Did you find the other one?"
Felix finds himself laughing. "I guess I did," he tells her. He scoops her up and kisses her cheek and strokes her curly hair. When he puts her down, Helo clasps his shoulder and Sharon hugs him tightly.
Tom comes over. "Congratulations, Captain," he says, and shakes Felix's hand.
"Thank you." Felix steps a little closer. "And thank you for going to bat for me. I can't tell you how much that meant."
Tom smiles, and ruffles Felix's curls. "You deserve it," he says. "I'm glad Adama listened."
Felix looks around the group. It's very small; Lucas knew him well enough to know that he'd want it that way. Just people who genuinely care about him, who love him. And people he loves in return. His eyes tear over, and for a moment he can't speak.
"Thank you," he finally says, when he can talk again. "Thank you all."
10. Love
They lay in bed together again that night, Felix's head on Lucas's shoulder. It's hot and sweaty and someone's arm will most certainly fall asleep, but neither of them want to move away. Felix closes his eyes. The world is upside down and he doesn't know what will happen from day to day, but for this moment, he's happy.
He'd almost forgotten how.
His breathing evens out and he's almost asleep when he feels Lucas running fingers through his hair. It's gentle, not meant to wake him, but meant to touch him. "Are you awake?" Lucas whispers. Felix doesn't really answer, because he's too tired and comfortable to do so. Lucas kisses his head gently. "I think I'm falling in love with you," he whispers.
Felix's eyes are closed, but all he can see is light. He takes a deep breath, and opens his eyes, looking up at Lucas, who looks surprised and nervous.
"I think I'm falling in love with you, too," he whispers back.
Title: Ten Good Things Happen to Felix Gaeta
Author:
lls_mutantRating: PG-13
Summary: See the title.
Length: about 3000 words
Pairing: Gaeta/Hoshi, with reference to Gaeta/Baltar
Spoilers: Through 4x10
Notes: Written for
daybreak777's "Gaeta's Good Things Challenge"1. A Hug
"You don't have to do this," Helo insists.
"I really don't mind," Felix says. True, babysitting isn't his first choice of activities in normal times, but these aren't normal times and it beats being around people. At least Hera doesn't pretend she's not staring at him. "Besides," he says bitterly, "it's nice to feel useful."
Helo opens his mouth to argue, and then closes it again resignedly. "Right," he says, rather than go down that path. "We won't be out too long."
"Thanks, Gaeta," Sharon says, and he smiles at them and gestures imperiously from his chair. But when the door clangs, he stares at Hera and wonders why the hell he offered to do this. He's not good with kids.
Hera's already asked the obligatory "why do you only have one leg?", and was satisfied with his answer of "because I lost the other." She watches him for a minute, and then turns back to her coloring. Felix rests his chin on his hand and closes his eyes.
He's only there for a minute when a book is dumped in his lap. When he opens his eyes he sees an old, worn tech manual with lots of diagrams, and Hera clutching her doll. "Read," she demands.
"You want me to read this?" he asks incredulously.
Hera nods.
Well, it beats butterfly princesses and fairy friends, so he obligingly opens the manual. Hera climbs up and wedges herself in between his good leg and the side of the chair, and he begins to read. As he does, Hera interrupts him and recites descriptions of the various machines, telling him that she's heard this hundreds of times already. But it's funny to listen to her little voice talk about laminar flow and combustion chambers, so they keep going.
Hera's hair is curly, like his. He strokes it softly as they read, and the thought flitters through his mind that they're both half a human. Fortunately, his brain kicks in before his mouth can say it. Hera's delighted with him, though, and they're still sitting there reading when Helo and Sharon return.
"She made you read the whole thing, didn't she?" Helo asks suspiciously.
"Read it again, Daddy?" Hera asks, sliding off the chair and holding it up to Helo.
"I think that's my cue to leave." Felix reaches for his crutches.
"Say goodnight to Felix," Sharon orders Hera.
"Good night," Hera says, and then comes over and hugs him. Fortunately he's still sitting, or it would have knocked him off balance. "Have a good sleep," she tells him gleefully.
Felix hugs her back. "You too."
2. A Connection
Whenever they're in orbit, Felix feels a bit useless. Especially now, when he has no idea where- or if- they're going anywhere now that Earth's turned out to be inhabitable. He sits at his console, watching the Dradis blink and wondering if it would be really obvious if he pulled up a game on the computer.
Hoshi appears beside him. "Do you have the algorithm for the water distribution system?" he asks.
For a moment, Felix can't speak, because when Hoshi puts a hand on his shoulder something sparks through him, warm and rusty. "Yeah," he says finally, hoping his voice isn't coming out as a croak. "Let me pull it up for you." He's conscious of the way his fingers dance over the keyboard.
He hasn't felt like this in a long time, not since those first heady days on New Caprica. But Gaius broke his heart- he can admit that now- and even when he was watching Helo, he knew it was because Helo was safe. This isn't safe, but it's not dangerous either. The program springs to life before him, and he moves his chair aside so Hoshi can see it.
Hoshi takes rapid notes on his pad. He doesn't seem to be looking at Felix, but Felix is very aware of their proximity. But he looks down at what's left of his leg and his stomach twists, because that's going to settle that.
Hoshi stands up from the computer. "Great. Thank you."
"You're welcome," Felix says.
Hoshi doesn't leave. Instead, he shifts uncomfortably. "Haven't seen you around much off duty," he says.
"Yeah, well." Felix shrugs.
"I'd like to."
That direct statement makes Felix look up, and when he does he sees Hoshi watching him. And with him sitting there at his console and Hoshi standing, he's reminded of that moment when they'd reached Earth, and just for a moment, he'd been-
"Listen," Hoshi says, breaking off his train of thought, "I was wondering. Would you like to go to Joe's and get a drink after this shift?"
Felix smiles. "Sure," he says. "I'd like that a lot."
Hoshi bursts into a smile. "Great," he says. "I'll see you after."
Felix watches him walk away. It's only then that he notices that Dee is the Communications Officer on shift, and she's giving a thumbs up. Not to him, but to Hoshi.
Hoshi leaves the CIC, and Felix can't help the grin that spreads across his face.
3. An Advocate
The meeting in the conference room isn't supposed to start for ten minutes, but Felix still hasn't figured out how long it takes him to get places on the ship with his crutches, so he's early. He begins to open the door and is about to shove it open when he hears the voices inside.
"You're not the President," Adama says, "and I don't appreciate you telling me how to run my crew."
"I am not telling you how to run your crew." Felix immediately recognizes Tom Zarek's voice and smiles. "I am just saying that it's ridiculous that you've overlooked him for so long."
There's no response, but Felix can see the you'd better shut up now look on Adama's face, even if he can't physically see the man. But Tom ignores it and continues on.
"He passed information that got us all off of New Caprica. He's navigated this entire course to Earth. He calculates every jump and got us here safely, and it's not his fault the place is such a shithole. He's had to take orders from a woman who, from what I heard, tried to kill him even after she knew he was innocent. He constantly works double shifts, he's in the lab all the time, and for crying out loud, he returned to work four days after having his leg amputated! What more do you need for this kid to get a promotion?"
"Not stabbing prisoners with a pen would be a start," Adama says. He launches into more of an explanation, but Felix closes the door gently and navigates to another room, needing to sit down.
It's not that he hasn't been promoted. He's seethed over that, but he's also made his mistakes and can accept it. It's not that Adama's arguing about it. It's that for once, someone actually stuck up for him. Someone actually said that he was worth fighting for, and then went ahead and did it. Someone in the Fleet actually gave a shit.
He bows his head, and he's glad that no one's in here to see him right now. And although his throat is closed and his eyes are suspiciously wet, he smiles.
4. A Kiss
It's the third time in as many days that they've gone to Joe's together. Hoshi is easy to talk to, and they have a lot in common. Not just their jobs, but they've seen a lot of the same movies and have similar beliefs, and they seem to find the same things funny. Felix has enjoyed those drinks, and he's pretty sure Hoshi has, too.
Afterwards they walk through the halls, Hoshi setting his pace to match Felix's, but doing it in a way that seems casual. Natural. He's got his hands in his pockets and his eyes on Felix, and suddenly Felix desperately wants to get to their quarters because he knows what's coming and he wants it to happen.
One of the gods must be watching, because when Hoshi opens the door to the racks no one is in there. Felix smiles and sits down at the table. "I have another bottle," he suggests, "if you'd like another drink."
Hoshi smiles, and there's something nervous behind it. It's kind of adorable, especially since Felix feels the same way. "That sounds good," he agrees, and Felix stands up to get it. He likes the fact that Hoshi doesn't insist he sit, and he also likes the fact that Hoshi finds the glasses and brings them over.
"You know," Felix realizes once they're sitting with their glasses in front of them, "I don't even know your first name."
"Really? It's Lucas."
"Lucas." It feels strange to say it, just like it always feels strange when someone starts calling him Felix for the first time. But it's a good sort of strange.
Hoshi- Lucas- pulls out a deck of cards. "Want to play, Felix?" he asks, quirking his eyebrow up on the last word.
He's really asking something else, and Felix grins. "Do I ever."
Lucas deals and they begin playing, neither of them focused nearly as much on the cards as on each other. And when Lucas finally puts the cards down and leans over to kiss him, Felix is quite certain that something is going to go right for a change.
He's wrong, of course. Neither of them had wanted to presume so neither of them put the boots out, and the door clangs open. They snap back from each other as four other people enter the room, complaining about the meal they'd just eaten. But Lucas smiles at him and reaches out to touch his cheek, and Felix knows that this will be continued.
5. A Leg
Felix hates going to sickbay, but only because of what it means. He quite likes Cottle, and he's pretty sure Cottle likes him. It's only been a few weeks, but already he's sick and tired of therapy and exercises.
When Cottle sees him, he smiles. "There's some good news, Felix," he says.
Felix hoists himself up on the table. "There is, sir?"
"There was a heart attack over on the Prometheus," Cottle says.
"Doesn't sound like terribly good news to me," Felix mutters.
"It will. Unfortunately, the gentleman died. But Dr. Martin contacted me to let me know that he did have a prosthetic leg."
The words cut through the fog and the misery. "Sir?"
"Granted, demand for prosthetics isn't high in the Fleet," Cottle admitted, lighting up a cigarette. "But even if it was, you were at the top of the list to receive one. And it turns out it's even the correct leg. Custom fitted, but we can work around it."
Felix can't believe it. "A leg."
"Martin's sending it over this afternoon." Cottle smiled. "After we're done with your exercises, I think we need to take some measurements so I can get it fitted."
It's a moment of sheer impulse and completely unlike him, but this news is tantamount to when they reached Earth, at least for him. Felix hugs Doc Cottle, and when he lets go they're both laughing.
6. A Moment of Healing
Some god must have decided Felix had been tortured enough, because it turns out the man who'd died was almost exactly the same height as Felix. The new leg fits well enough, although it feels awkward and strange. Cottle assures him that it will improve.
He works with Cottle for two hours, and then he's on shift. They've left Earth, so there are jumps to plot and ships to refuel, and the shift is busy. Felix feels needed, and he feels competent. The CIC is far from the same, but when he's at his console he has a few moments where he can pretend that it is.
He meets Lucas after his shift for drinks at Joe's, and tonight they aren't alone. People come over, talking and laughing, and they're a part of a group. The racks are occupied when Felix gets back, but that's okay because Lucas had duty soon anyway.
He eases himself into bed, and suddenly, he realizes that he hasn't thought about Gaius Baltar all day. The name still sends shafts of pain through him when he thinks it, but the fact he hasn't thought it at all… well, that has to mean something, doesn't it?
He folds his arms behind his head and looks up at the ceiling above him. He doesn't believe the wounds will ever completely heal. Some wounds don't, after all. And he wonders if he should tell Lucas just what happened. Maybe someday, he decides, because even just thinking about it fills him with shame.
It's not much, that he didn't think of Gaius at all today. But it's something, and he'll take it.
7. A Promotion
"Mr. Gaeta," the Admiral says. "Please come in."
Adama is worn and haggard, and Felix can't blame him. There's enough unrest going on and enough to worry about… Gods knows he worries about it enough himself, and he doesn't have the entire Fleet hanging on him. Well, not like Adama does.
"Have a seat," Adama orders.
"Thank you, sir."
Adama sets aside whatever it is he's working on, and sits back in his chair. "I'm glad to see that Cottle found you a prosthetic."
"Yes, sir."
Adama looks like he wants to say something more, but isn't sure how to phrase it. Felix regards him evenly. He still likes Adama, still respects him, but when he looks at him he feels some echo of that betrayal that he feels when he thinks about Gaius. He wonders if it shows on his face.
Adama finally opens up the desk drawer and pulls out a small box. Felix's heart begins to pound, because he knows what that little box means and he's almost given up hope of ever seeing it.
"This has been a long time in coming," Adama says, passing the box over to Felix. "It's been brought to my attention that it's overdue, and it's time we remedied it. Congratulations, Captain Gaeta."
He salutes, and Felix salutes back. "Thank you, sir."
8. A Lover
"That was…" Felix closes his eyes and laughs at the ceiling. "That was amazing."
"I agree." Lucas props himself up on one elbow, smiling down at him. "You are amazing."
Felix flushes. He's only ever had two lovers before; Skulls and Baltar. Amazing isn't the word he'd use to describe himself in bed, but he's not going to complain. "Thank you," he says softly.
Lucas touches his face. "Any time," he says, his voice low and intimate.
He settles on the bed, wrapping an arm around Felix and arranging them both so they're vaguely comfortable in the narrow rack. Felix can't help smiling. It's not just the sex, although that certainly was enough to make anyone smile. What really is resonating in him is the way Lucas looks at him, the way he touches him. It's like he's whole again, because Lucas isn't just seeing the missing leg and the broken dreams, but the man that they belong to.
Lucas clears his throat. "Just so we're clear," he says suddenly, "you know that this isn't just a one-time thing for me, right? That it's not just a bit of fun?"
The echo of those words makes Felix close his eyes. "Yes," he says, pushing away when he'd heard almost the same words and the opposite sentiments. "It's not a one-time thing for me, either." He tightens his arm around Lucas's waist, and kisses his cheek. Lucas turns his head and their lips meet, and their bodies meld together again.
9. A Family
"Come on," Lucas says. "We're not going to Joe's tonight."
"We're not?" But Felix follows along, amused and game.
"We're not." Lucas leads him back to their racks. Felix smiles to himself, because hey- who doesn't smile at the thought of sex- but fortunately has the good sense to restrain himself from groping Lucas before they get there.
And it's a very good thing, because when Lucas opens the door there's a sign and people smiling, waiting for them. The sign says Congratualations, Captain Gaeta, and it's hung over a table with a small spread and a bottle of booze. Dee greets him with a hug and a kiss on the cheek, Cottle is clapping, and when Helo sets Hera down, she runs up and hugs him.
"You have two legs," she says. "Did you find the other one?"
Felix finds himself laughing. "I guess I did," he tells her. He scoops her up and kisses her cheek and strokes her curly hair. When he puts her down, Helo clasps his shoulder and Sharon hugs him tightly.
Tom comes over. "Congratulations, Captain," he says, and shakes Felix's hand.
"Thank you." Felix steps a little closer. "And thank you for going to bat for me. I can't tell you how much that meant."
Tom smiles, and ruffles Felix's curls. "You deserve it," he says. "I'm glad Adama listened."
Felix looks around the group. It's very small; Lucas knew him well enough to know that he'd want it that way. Just people who genuinely care about him, who love him. And people he loves in return. His eyes tear over, and for a moment he can't speak.
"Thank you," he finally says, when he can talk again. "Thank you all."
10. Love
They lay in bed together again that night, Felix's head on Lucas's shoulder. It's hot and sweaty and someone's arm will most certainly fall asleep, but neither of them want to move away. Felix closes his eyes. The world is upside down and he doesn't know what will happen from day to day, but for this moment, he's happy.
He'd almost forgotten how.
His breathing evens out and he's almost asleep when he feels Lucas running fingers through his hair. It's gentle, not meant to wake him, but meant to touch him. "Are you awake?" Lucas whispers. Felix doesn't really answer, because he's too tired and comfortable to do so. Lucas kisses his head gently. "I think I'm falling in love with you," he whispers.
Felix's eyes are closed, but all he can see is light. He takes a deep breath, and opens his eyes, looking up at Lucas, who looks surprised and nervous.
"I think I'm falling in love with you, too," he whispers back.
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Date: 2008-11-21 03:05 pm (UTC)Ha. I loved that little detail especially. I actually had to pause reading so I could giggle a bit.
Excellent stuff! :D
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Date: 2008-11-21 07:30 pm (UTC)Glad you enjoyed it! :)
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Date: 2008-11-21 03:30 pm (UTC)I loved the little beats with Hera innocently remarking on his lost leg. I loved the promotion and the support he got from his friends - Helo, Dee, Cottle and (in your verse) Zarek. I loved Felix's realisation that he had stopped thinking about Baltar, though it was so hurty to think how much time he must have spent dwelling on that heartbreak. And I think you've got the right idea about writing Hoshi. For me, Hoshi just needs to be everything that can heal poor Felix.
LOVES! *draws hearts around this fic*
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Date: 2008-11-21 07:43 pm (UTC)Glad you enjoyed it! :)
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Date: 2008-11-21 03:56 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-21 07:44 pm (UTC)Glad you enjoyed it!
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Date: 2008-11-21 04:31 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-21 07:45 pm (UTC)Hera got a little help from my own kid, who's about her age ;) (Especially with the tech manual.) And it's nice to see Gaeta happy, even if it's only for a few minutes.
Glad you enjoyed it!
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Date: 2008-11-21 04:36 pm (UTC)Is that a military tradition? It's neat and makes good sense.
A great read. Thanks for it.
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Date: 2008-11-21 07:46 pm (UTC)I think it's a college tradition ;) Actually, in one of the episodes when Starbuck catches Lee and Dee, or when Lee catches Sam and Starbuck (I forget which) they mention the boots. But yeah- sock on the doorknob!
Glad you enjoyed it :)
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Date: 2008-11-21 05:20 pm (UTC)Adama was being a douche tho :)
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Date: 2008-11-21 07:47 pm (UTC)Yeah, I love Adama, but whenever I write him he tends to be a bit of a douche. But I usually write him from Gaeta or Zarek's point of view- or at least around Zarek- and that does tend to bring out the worst in him, doesn't it? :)
Thanks again! :)
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Date: 2008-11-21 06:11 pm (UTC)myour boy happy and in such good ways! And somebody loves him! And many people cared. Dee, Cottle, Sharon, Helo, Tom Zarek . . . and finally Hoshi. I can't even pick a favorite or favorite lines because I loved all of it.Thank you so much!
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Date: 2008-11-21 07:49 pm (UTC)Glad you enjoyed it!
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Date: 2008-11-21 08:17 pm (UTC)I especially adored Hera. Poor Felix goes babysitting because he wants to be useful. I liked her love for tech manuals. Maybe it's a robot thing. :D
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Date: 2008-11-21 08:44 pm (UTC)I liked her love for tech manuals. Maybe it's a robot thing. :D
Heh- I realized that after. I got thinking about it and realized that there probably aren't that many kiddy books aboard the Galactica, so what was Hera reading? (Of course, she did have crayons...) But it's also very inspired by my son. He's about the same age as Hera, and he adores the non-fiction section. His current favorite book is about Saturn, and he walks around reciting that Saturn is made of hydrogen and helium and sulfur, which makes it appear yellow. :) (Can you tell we've read it a few times?) I don't think he really understands what he's saying, but it's really funny.
But i still think Hera's got a potty training subroutine in her head somewhere ;)
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Date: 2008-11-21 09:27 pm (UTC)I loved how you portrayed him in this fic, actually. Not flashy, not bold, but not overly shy either. Just very normal and very stable, and totally lacking in presumption. After life with Baltar and New Caprica, I think Felix could *really* use a dose of that. And I loved how matter-of-factly you had Hoshi ask him out on a date. Lovely timing, too. It took me by surprise as much as it did Felix, even though I had an idea that was what he was up to.
Hera was totally adorable. I wasn't expecting to see her in this fic, but it makes sense given Felix's friendship with Helo. I love how she's eerily advanced enough that she reads tech manuals for bedtime stories, but also enough of a little girl that she believes that Felix "lost" and then "found" his leg. :D
The Zarek one was so touching. I guess Adama's behavior was the one moment when this fic was ever a downer, and it wasn't too much so, although Adama's comment about not stabbing prisoners in the pen kind of infuriated me, because Adama brought that situation totally on himself. I'm sure he made Felix do that interrogation, and didn't even once consider the possibility that it was probably going to be very painful for Felix to conduct it, and to lie on top of everything else. So for him to pick that point to hold back a promotion for Felix? Oooh! *shakes fist*. Anyway, I loved Zarek fighting for him almost as much as Felix did. And Zarek being at his congratulatory party was totally awesome. And you got in hair ruffles!!! Anybody who ruffles my boy's hair is okay in my book. (Although Baltar probably ruffled his hair too...never mind. Still Zarek is kind of sweet when you write him, I must admit.
Lucas clears his throat. "Just so we're clear," he says suddenly, "you know that this isn't just a one-time thing for me, right? That it's not just a bit of fun?"
First of all: Lucas!!!! I really like that his name comes from the word "light" - which is just what Hoshi is in Felix's life, some very-much-needed light, after a long run of darkness in Felix's life. Secondly, I SAW WHAT YOU DID THERE. DON'T THINK I DIDN'T. Hoshi is indeed Felix's anti-Gaius, and even my Baltar/Gaeta shippery heart can't begrudge some real love for Felix. And what's really sweet is that I can't tell who Hoshi makes that statement for more - for Felix or himself - but either way, it's lovely to see Felix being treated with respect.
Ok, and just when I thought plenty of good things had happened to Felix, then you gave him a prosthetic leg! It was like over-the-top good things for Gaeta (not that I'm complaining)! Also, I really liked the avuncular way Cottle treats Felix in this - part doctor, part family. And I loved that he was at Felix's party.
Yay! That was so much fun! Thanks for sharing this with us.
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Date: 2008-11-22 01:02 am (UTC)You're going to make me actually care about Hoshi, aren't you?
I can try :) I'm debating when I'm going to write the Dee-Hoshi thing, because I do kind of want to see what the webisodes bring us. (Like, maybe a first name???) And then when the BSG writers KILL HIM, we'll all cry :)
I love how she's eerily advanced enough that she reads tech manuals for bedtime stories, but also enough of a little girl that she believes that Felix "lost" and then "found" his leg. :D
Thanks. :) The funny thing about Hera is that I didn't mean to make her seem Cylon-ish. I got thinking that there probably weren't that many copies of "The Very Hungry Caterpillar" floating around Galactica, and what Helo and Sharon would use in a pinch. And it's also inspired by my own kid, who's the same age as Hera and has an unholy love for the non-fiction section of the library. (We've been reading about Saturn, and he walks around reciting bits and pieces from the book, like how Saturn is made out of hydrogen and helium and Galileo discovered the rings.)
And you got in hair ruffles!!! Anybody who ruffles my boy's hair is okay in my book. (Although Baltar probably ruffled his hair too...never mind. Still Zarek is kind of sweet when you write him, I must admit.
Of course! I HAD to do the hair ruffles, especially from Zarek :) Yeah, he does come across kind of sweet when he's not planning to possibly blackmail Felix, doesn't he? I like the idea that Zarek is actually a nice guy if you don't have anything he wants from you or aren't standing in his way, and enjoys having that connection.
I really like that his name comes from the word "light"
Really???? That's cool! I just had a baby names book and went through the Ls until I found something that sounded good with "Hoshi". :)
econdly, I SAW WHAT YOU DID THERE. DON'T THINK I DIDN'T.
::HUGE grin:: I was hoping someone would catch that! It was my second favorite line, after the snide crack about tech manuals being better than butterfly princesses and fairy friends (given AJ's voice work on Barbie movies). But yeah, I couldn't resist the parallel.
So glad you enjoyed it! I really had fun writing it :)
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Date: 2008-11-21 09:35 pm (UTC)Lucas! Gawd, why did I not think of that... My Star Wars-obsessed friend and I were calling him Lando. XD Lucas is SO much better. You are full of win. Really, I said "AAAWWWWW" out loud whilst reading. *confetti*
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Date: 2008-11-22 01:04 am (UTC)Thanks! :) (And awesome icon.)
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Date: 2008-11-21 10:34 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2008-11-22 04:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-11-22 03:30 am (UTC)I'm going to bookmark it and read it when I'm feeling down.
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Date: 2008-11-22 04:49 am (UTC)Thanks- so glad you enjoyed it! :)
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Date: 2008-11-22 04:14 pm (UTC)Gaeta is one of my favorite characters, and I love that you had good things happen to him, instead of bad. Thank you!
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Date: 2008-11-22 07:19 pm (UTC)And I totally must agree with your icon :)
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Date: 2008-11-22 04:47 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2008-11-24 06:46 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2008-11-29 07:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-01 09:14 pm (UTC)(And as for Dee, think of it this way. Hooking up with Felix likely means Hoshi's wearing a bright red shirt. They might not be giving Felix Dee, but at least they aren't killing her off, and there might be some great shots of her comforting him after they off his boyfriend? :) )
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Date: 2008-12-10 08:31 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-10 12:13 pm (UTC)Thanks! :)
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Date: 2008-12-13 05:07 pm (UTC)This is genuinely the cherry-on-top of the ice cream sundae that was finding out that the new Webisodes have started & encountering the Gaeta/Hoshi (or should I say Felix/Lucas?) and Cylon-in-the-CIC impending disaster-movie.
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Date: 2008-12-14 04:38 am (UTC)I'd been spoiled for Gaeta/Hoshi, which was part of what prompted this. (If his first name is Lucas, I will DIE. Hopefully we'll get a first name.) Glad you enjoyed it- I had fun writing it!
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Date: 2009-02-02 12:49 am (UTC)I think I'll just take this and pretend it's how it actually happened, ok? Because this is too sweet.
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Date: 2009-03-04 03:04 am (UTC)the thought flitters through his mind that they're both half a human. That line really got me. *sniff*
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Date: 2009-03-12 12:01 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-03-12 11:56 am (UTC)Thank you!!!!
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