FIC: Internal Exiles
Mar. 17th, 2009 12:10 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lls_mutantOh, good God. I took the boys to get haircuts today. Misery is taking a 1 year old and a 3 year old to get haircuts. Let's just say I tipped the stylist REALLY well, okay?
So I ended up writing that fic that started percolating in my mind. Sheesh. It wasn't on my list of things to write (I was supposed to finish my Watchmen review today, and maybe Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Long-assed-title), but it demanded to be written. So, written it was.
Title: Internal Exiles
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
lls_mutant
Characters: Baltar, Narcho, Tigh, Caprica Six, Adama, Lee, and Hoshi
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Through No Exit
Summary: Five people who didn't pin Gaeta's picture to the Memorial Wall, and the one who did.
Notes: It's been one of those days. I forget who to blame for this one, but I was really desperate for someone to put Gaeta's picture on the wall.daybreak777, I think you'll laugh when you see who I had do it.
Gaius Baltar
"Fire."
The guns ring out, deafening in the airlock. Gaius forces himself to watch, and Tom and Felix's heads snap forward simultaneously. The ringing echo of the shots dies away slowly, the smoke clearing, and then there is silence.
"Save the chairs," Adama tells one of the Marines. His face is stone, impassive. The Marine nods and steps forward, cutting the two men away and letting their bodies fall to the ground. To Gaius's surprise, a second Marine steps forward and, after a quick glance at Adama, kneels and removes Felix's dogtags. Adama doesn't react.
Gaius feels like he should say something- anything. Step forward and say a few words over the bodies. But somehow, he doubts that the Admiral would allow that. Zarek and Gaeta are traitors, and traitors don't rate funerals, did they? So he bows his head alone, closing his eyes and trying to shut out the picture of the violence.
"Baltar." Tigh's voice is rough and too loud in the aftermath. "Get your ass in gear unless you want to be flushed out the airlock, too."
Gaius jerks back to reality and nods, stepping out of the airlock. There are a few people milling around: Marines who had been guarding the doorway, and a Colonial officer in his duty blues with a white face and stricken eyes. He stands between two Marines, and Gaius can't quite tell if he's being restrained or supported.
The Marine who has the dogtags drops them into the officer's hand without a word. The gesture seems cold, but his silence is respectful; the silence of a soldier handing the folded flag to the widower. The realization of who this officer must be and what he must have meant to Felix comes too late, after Gaius is walking down the hall and away from the man.
I know who you are, Felix.
The words ring in his head, as deafening as the gunshots themselves. And they're true… in their way. He's now painfully aware of just how many specifics he never knew and he stops in his tracks, wondering if he should go back down the corridor to find that officer. Funerals and wakes are for the living, but for once Gaius has the sense to realize that this man won't welcome him with open arms, and his presence would only increase the officer's pain.
Besides, he'd rather be alone right now anyway.
Galactica is full of nooks and crannies and places to hide, and it's not hard to find a locker that was meant to hold foodstuffs but is now empty. He closes the hatch behind him, and when he does, the tears streak his face and he slides down the wall to sit on the cold floor.
He's been charged, entrusted to carry on a legacy. And he has no frakking idea of how to go about doing it.
Well, it's not that he doesn't know. He's got a wireless and an audience. He's written a book before, he can do it again. He could just walk up to people and tell them, hold a public funeral, fight Adama if he really wanted to.
And right now, that would accomplish nothing. Nothing but stirring up more bitterness in the wrong places, and getting his own self killed or tossed in the brig, most likely.
What he should do is put a picture of Felix on the Memorial Wall. The thought seizes him and he jumps to his feet like an eager puppy, even as he imagines the sentimentality of putting Felix's picture next to Adrian's. He's opened the door and halfway down the hall when it hits him.
He doesn't have a picture.
Felix was the closest thing he's had to a friend- Felix was his best friend- since the Colonies fell, and he doesn't have a Goddamned picture of him.
He creeps back to his locker and shuts the door quietly, and he hides.
Noel Allison
The brig door clangs open, and Noel jumps to his feet, heart in his throat. It's not Gaeta or Zarek, but Louis Hoshi. For a wild moment Noel thinks that Felix finally broke down and told Louis, but then he realizes Louis is probably just in here until Adama can question him. He walks over to the bars of his cell, wrapping his hands around the cold metal.
"Louis?"
Louis ignores him, but Noel knows him well enough to know that the set of his shoulders and the way his jaw twitches that he's very aware of him standing there. He tries again. "Louis. What happened to Felix?"
"Dead," Louis bites out. "Firing squad."
"Frak." Noel reels back from the bars, his knees threatening to give out and his stomach clenching. He bats eyes irritably- he is not going to cry. Not right now. "I'm sorry," he says.
"You're sorry?" Louis wheels around, and reaches through the bars. He manages to grab Noel's tanks and yanks him forward. "You're frakking sorry? 'Sorry' doesn't make a damn thing better. It doesn't make a frakking mutiny better. And it doesn't bring him back! Don't give me your frakking 'sorry'!" He pushes Noel away and Noel stumbles until his knees hit the cot in his cell. He sits down, and when he looks, Louis is still standing, arms crossed and eyes blazing.
"You're sorry," he spits out mockingly. "We all took an oath. You took an oath, and I know how frakking much you believed in it. Of all people…" Louis shakes his head in disgust. He started to turn away, and then turned back again.
"And why are you even here? Why is it that you know and I had no frakking clue? You and Felix never said two words to each other until he and I…" he shakes his head again. "Why the frak you?"
"Because he knew damn well we'd probably all end up here!" Noel shouts. "You think he wanted you in here? You think he wanted you in front of that firing squad? Use that frakking head you're so proud of, Louis. Felix made sure that you were safe, not just now but later, when Adama starts asking questions."
"And if I didn't want to be safe?" Louis demands. "I don't need your pity or your protection!"
"Well, then, that would have gone really well for what we were trying to do, wouldn't it?"
Louis glares at him, frustrated, and then storms to the opposite side of his cell. It's footsteps away, but his point is made.
It's then that Noel notices that Louis is clutching a pair of dogtags for all he's worth, and that's when it sinks in that this is real.
He sits back against the wall and huddles in on himself. He didn't expect the news to feel quite like this- Louis is right when he says he and Felix never were friends until Felix got involved with Louis. But they bonded quickly, and there had been nights of cards and smoking and laughter before Felix had left on the Demetrius. With so many friends dead, you cling to the ones who remain pretty tightly.
There's a picture in his rack. It's the three of them, and they're making faces at the camera and drunk out of their minds. He wipes at his face. "Hey, Louis," he says, getting up and moving towards the bars.
Louis doesn't answer- he's pretending to be sleeping. But Noel slept beside him for two years; he damn well knows that Louis is faking it. He sighs. "I know you're awake," he says, "and you don't have to say anything, okay? Just listen. In my locker, on the mirror. There's that picture Cally took of the three of us." He suddenly realizes exactly where this request is going, and he has to cut off to swallow hard. "Put it up on the Memorial Wall, will you? Not just for Felix, but for me."
Louis rolls over and blinks at him for a long time. "Adama's not going to kill you," he says.
"What?"
"Not yet. He killed Felix and Zarek," Louis almost spits the second name, "but he won't kill the rest of you. Not yet. He might need you."
Noel nods, and oddly, finds a part of him envying Felix. It's die now or die later from the sounds of it, in a suicide mission or a last-chance battle. "Well," he says slowly, "hold onto it. And when I die, put it up."
"Whatever," Louis says angrily, and turns over. But Noel knows that means yes.
He sighs and sits back down on the cot. Die now or die later, but it doesn't matter. They're all going to die anyway.
Saul Tigh
The last order of business of the day is dealing with Lieutenant Hoshi. "Go get some rest," Bill tells Saul. "You need it, and I can handle this one on my own."
He's exhausted, but Saul shakes his head. "No, I'll come with you. I can't stand beside him in the CIC unless I'm convinced he doesn't belong in the brig."
"Suit yourself," Bill says.
They walk down toward the brig together, and Saul catches a whiff of alcohol in Bill's wake. But he doesn't say anything, because damn it, he'd really like a drink himself. This is the kind of day that made him start drinking in the first place.
They bring Hoshi out, all anger and fire and clenched hands and trembling. Bill sits down.
"How much did you know about Gaeta's plans?" he demands.
"Nothing," Hoshi spits out. "Absolutely nothing."
Saul raises his eyebrows. "Nothing, sir," he corrects, not unaware of the irony of the last time he made that correction.
"Nothing, sir," Hoshi grinds out, and Bill gets the parallels, too.
"I find that hard to believe, Mr. Hoshi. As I understand it, you and Gaeta were close."
"Yeah, well, I thought so, too." Hoshi looks away, and that's the first indication that something's up.
Bill presses on. "You were romantically involved, am I right?"
"Going to bust me for fraternization now?" Hoshi demands, a bitter laugh punctuating the sentence. "Oh, excuse me. Going to bust me for fraternization now, sir?"
"If you're trying to convince me you're guilty, you're doing a damn good job of it, Lieutenant."
Hoshi winces and looks down. He's angry, but he's broken at the moment, too. Saul finds himself wanting to say something, but keeps quiet for the moment, letting Bill handle it.
"I'm waiting for an answer."
Hoshi sighs. "Sir," he says, sitting back loosely in his chair, "I didn't know anything, except that Felix was angry after you didn't do anything about the Raptor."
"I didn't do anything because investigating put him at risk," Bill growls. "If I started asking questions, I'd have a basestar of Cylons looking for his head."
"I know," Hoshi says, and the grief surfaces a little more. "But he didn't. And he was angry. He told me he was going to do something… but I never thought he'd do this. Never. Not Felix."
"Yeah, well, neither did we," Saul says, and his voice sounds rougher than he thought it would. "But he did."
Hoshi shrugs. "He left me, you know," he says, and the knife comes back to his voice. "Right before he started all this, I'm guessing. A matter of days. Was it really only days?" His voice cracks and he closes his eyes and rubs them, hiding them with his hand. His other hand is still clenched around the dog tags, and that's when Saul realizes that Hoshi is crying. He loved Gaeta, and now he's having to….
He's having to hand him a cup of poison, because no matter how much he loves him, Gaeta betrayed them all, and he has to answer for that.
Bill opens his mouth to speak, but Saul puts a hand on his arm. "He's telling the truth, Bill."
"Really." Bill is skeptical, but Saul is convinced.
"Really."
Bill looks up at him, nods, and then nods at Hoshi. "All right," he tells the lieutenant, "you're free to go. But if we have any reason- and I mean any reason- to suspect you knew about this, you'll be right back in here, and then out the airlock."
Hoshi nods. "Yes, sir."
The look on the lieutenant's face haunts Saul as he walks back to his quarters. When he arrives, Caprica is asleep, looking peaceful despite the exhaustion still obvious on her face. He turns on the light and hesitates as she stirs, and then pours himself a drink and sits down at the desk.
He knows exactly where he put the files, and after he takes a long swallow he reaches for them. Gaeta's is right on top, just like it was when he put them away after the Circle was disbanded. He takes another drink and opens it, and Gaeta smiles out at him from New Caprica, from the CIC, looking twelve years old in his dress grays.
Who took that frakking picture anyway? Saul doesn't remember it, but he should, given that he's standing right there.
It's even later when he realizes he's never going to make sense of any of this by staring at pictures, so he knocks back the rest of the drink and goes to bed.
Caprica Six
Saul's gone when she wakes up, and Caprica worries for him. Yesterday was a nightmare, and today won't be much easier. She shivers, pulling the blanket around her shoulders as she slides from the bed and pads across the cold metal floor.
Something crashes and she jumps, her hand over her stomach protectively.
Whatever it was is routine, and she curses herself for being so jumpy. She never was before. But it's not her life she's scared for, it's the baby. It's always the baby.
Saul left a bottle of liquor opened on his desk, and she goes to cork it, her stomach turning at the smell. But her hand freezes midair, glass stopper balanced delicately between her fingers, when she spots the picture on the desk.
Gaeta.
She picks up a picture slowly, remembering him from New Caprica. All angry eyes and coldness, doing his best to ignore her, especially around Gaius. Gaius, whom they'd both loved so much. Who had let them both down so badly. She wonders if anyone on Galactica knows that he'd had Gaius under his gun and let him go.
She would have shot him, but that was the difference between him and her.
She looks back at the bed where Saul had slept beside her, and then puts the picture down and dresses.
She walks through the halls of Galactica, carrying the picture and not quite sure where she's going with it. There are signs of the mutiny everywhere; bloodstains and bullet holes, grief and anger and tears. She stops abruptly and stares at a hole in the wall, and nearly collides with someone.
"Oh, I'm sorry," she says, and then realizes that it's Helo. "Shouldn't you be in sickbay?" The wound on his head looks terrible.
"Not particularly comfortable away from Sharon and Hera," he says, and she nods. He turns his head and looks at the bullet hole in the wall. "I can't believe it. I still can't turn it over in my head."
"It is hard to fathom," she agrees, but Helo's miles away.
"He was my friend," he tells Caprica. "Gaeta, I mean. I never… I know I made the call not to get him back to the Galactica, but to take it out on Sharon and Hera…."
He's hurting, so she puts a hand on his arm. As she does so, she notices an officer walking down the hall towards them. His pace slows, and he's watching them with wide eyes. "He's always been good at hiding," she tells Helo. "He fooled us all on New Caprica, humans and Cylons alike. There was no way you could have known. No way you could have seen this coming."
"No?" Helo bends in, and the officer that's been approaching has stopped completely now. "Maybe I could have seen it coming, if I had taken the frakking time to look. In two weeks he lost his leg, we lost Earth, and he lost Dee, and was on that Raptor. Maybe I should have seen it coming, if I was such a good friend."
"That doesn't justify what he did," Caprica says. The officer standing behind Helo has his jaw clenched, and she notices dark circles under his red eyes. She turns away from him. "He tried to kill Hera." She sees Helo's muscles strain.
"No," the officer says, and Helo spins around. Whatever he was about to say dies on his lips. "He didn't try to kill Hera," the officer says quietly. "He wouldn't have locked her up if that was the case. He would have just killed her, and he wouldn't do that."
The tendons in Helo's neck stand out, and Caprica realizes that he's restraining himself. The officer doesn't stare him down. Instead, he ducks his head, mumbles an apology, and continues down the hall, picking up speed as he goes.
"Helo?" she asks, and he turns back to her.
"Sorry," he says through clenched teeth. He takes a deep breath, and then glances back at in the officer's direction, who's now disappeared around a corner. "Look, I need to get home to Sharon and Hera, okay? Be careful, and I'll see you around."
He walks away, and she wonders for a second if he's going after that officer. But no, he turns the opposite direction. She looks down at the picture again.
This man almost brought about Hera's death. She understands his bitterness, but nothing justifies that. She crumples the picture in her hand and drops it into the nearest receptacle. And then she continues on.
Bill Adama
The CIC hatch opens. Bill looks up, expecting Lee, but it's not. It's Hoshi, creeping in and staring down at the CIC quietly, as if he expects the room to blow up as he walks in. Bill watches him for a moment and then turns away. He can't afford to let this time be any different than the others. It's like ripping off a bandage. The first time will hurt, but then after that it will be okay.
"Take your station, Mr. Hoshi," he says, gesturing to the tactical station.
"Yes sir."
Every eye in the CIC is following Hoshi down to the tactical station, and when he glances at him, Bill can tell he knows it, too. His chin is raised defiantly and his shoulders are squared, but as he passes, Bill realizes he's avoiding looking at anyone. He takes his seat, and although the CIC never really paused, the unspoken rhythm starts up again, like a machine rolling back into operation.
Years of serving with Tigh have taught him how to surreptitiously drink on duty, and he manages to take a swig from his flask. Everyone thinks that this is easy, that only anger propels him and he can banish Felix Gaeta from his mind with no effort. But the truth is he has to be careful or he'll call the wrong name, and that every time Hoshi speaks, he expects to hear Gaeta's voice. The truth is that he sees Gaeta's eyes in front of him constantly, accusing and angry, hears him yelling that he loves this ship more than he loves the people on it. He doesn't say a word about it, because his crew needs him to pretend he doesn't care, but it's there.
Hours pass, and then finally the door opens and Lee comes in. He looks professional and assured, although the nerves are there under his polished surface. Bill can see it in the dishevelment of his hair and the way his tie is loosened.
"What have you got?" he asks, without preamble.
Lee opens a folder. He's organized, and he takes Bill through his list of questions and concerns as fast as he can. These aren't the big issues, not the ones that have to be discussed behind closed doors, and so it's easy to fire back and forth.
At least, it's easy until a scrap of paper flutters to the ground.
Bill picks it up, staring at it. It's a picture of Zarek and Gaeta on New Caprica, Zarek's arm around Gaeta's shoulders as they both smile at the camera. He swallows hard. "You brought this into the CIC?"
Lee's stare is penetrating; he's not fooled like everyone else pretends to be. "I found it while I was cleaning out the Vice President's office," he says. "It was the only picture he had in there."
"I find that hard to believe." Bill sets the picture down on the table. The light behind it makes it look ethereal, and he looks away from it. A mistake, because he finds himself looking directly at Hoshi, and he realizes that there is nowhere this CIC that he can look without feeling guilty. "What are you going to do with it?"
Lee shrugs. "I thought that someone might want to put it on the Memorial Wall."
"You weren't thinking me, I hope." The words taste sour on his lips, and this time he doesn't hide the swig he takes. And Lee doesn't hide the disapproval in his eyes.
"I wasn't thinking of anyone," Lee says, and hoists himself into his presidential posture. But Bill knows he was meant to see the picture, meant to offer. Maybe Lee thought it would give him some peace, maybe Lee thought it was something the Admiral should do. Either way, Lee was wrong.
"Is there anything else?" Bill asks.
"No."
"Then we're done here." He turns back to the CIC table, raises his chin defiantly, squares his shoulders, and avoids looking at anyone.
Lee Adama
He should have known better than to expect anything from his father. Lee sighs. Some sense of fairness dictates that he should understand, that the wounds are too raw. And yet, one day can't erase years of feeling, and Lee knows that just as well as anyone else in this Fleet.
He stands in the Memorial Hall and looks at the picture. Tom Zarek was… what was he to Lee? A mentor, of a sort, although Lee never wanted to be the kind of politician Zarek was. Just the kind that Zarek wanted to see himself as.
A father figure? In a strange way, Lee had once believed that, until he'd found this picture. There is something about Zarek's stance that is relaxed and easy, and something about the way he stands with Gaeta that is… well, Lee can't put his finger on it except to say that now he knows "father figure" isn't the right term.
Funny that he finds himself envying Felix Gaeta over that one, just a little.
Whatever he was, Zarek had been someone in his life, and Lee wants to honor that, even as he wants to forget it forever. There is no better way than to leave the man's picture on a wall he doesn't have to look at and doesn't have to walk past.
He takes the picture between his fingers, ready to tear it in two.
"Don't."
Lee stops. "Lieutenant Hoshi."
"Sir… please. Don't tear it."
"You saw the picture?" Lee asks, a little wary. He's known about Gaeta and Hoshi since they began, because it was back when Dee was still with him. And now Hoshi's standing here in front of him, and he nods.
"Ididn't see it. I knew it existed. Felix told me, a while back." He shakes his head in frustration. "I didn't know that you'd bring it over here, but when I heard the Admiral mention the picture, it wasn't hard to guess which one he meant."
"Yeah, well…" Lee shrugs. "I thought maybe someone would have put a picture up by now." He draws a breath in as he looks at the wall. "Unless I missed it, I was wrong."
Hoshi looks forward, eyes fixed on the wall in a way that suggests if he looks at Lee, he's not going to finish his sentence. "I have four pictures of Felix," he says. Lee looks down at Hoshi's hands and realizes he's holding them. The one on top is a picture of the two of them together, Hoshi behind Gaeta, arms wrapped around him, Gaeta's hands over his, and both of them laughing. "I don't really want to give them up…" Hoshi looks down at the pictures.
There's something in the way he looks at Lee then that reminds Lee of days on the Pegasus. Days when he was a commanding officer, someone who was entrusted with the responsibility of his soldiers. And he realizes that this man has no one to grieve with, that he's bearing his loss alone.
He nods, fumbling for words because there's nothing that's right to say. He takes the pictures from Hoshi and looks at them. The one he saw, a picture of Gaeta in a flight suit shaking an older officer's hand, Gaeta in civilian clothes in Joe's, and a picture of Hoshi, Narcho, and Gaeta all making ludicrous drunken faces at the camera. Hoshi stares at them helplessly, and Lee realizes as he looks through them that these are the only four pictures that Hoshi has.
He hands them back, closing Hoshi's hand around them. "Come on," he says, extending the untorn picture of Zarek and Gaeta. "Let's find a place for them."
They choose an out of the way corner, Lee pins the picture there. Tom and Felix smile at them, hopeful and alive in the sun of a new world. Hoshi smiles, reaches out, and touches the picture softly, and for a moment, he's at peace.
There are bootsteps, and they both pull away from the wall and from each other. A deckhand glances at them as she passes by, headed to a different part of the Hall. But the moment is broken, and Hoshi just nods at Lee, and then turns and walks away.
Lee watches him go, and then turns and walks the other way.
So I ended up writing that fic that started percolating in my mind. Sheesh. It wasn't on my list of things to write (I was supposed to finish my Watchmen review today, and maybe Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Long-assed-title), but it demanded to be written. So, written it was.
Title: Internal Exiles
Author:
lls_mutantCharacters: Baltar, Narcho, Tigh, Caprica Six, Adama, Lee, and Hoshi
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Through No Exit
Summary: Five people who didn't pin Gaeta's picture to the Memorial Wall, and the one who did.
Notes: It's been one of those days. I forget who to blame for this one, but I was really desperate for someone to put Gaeta's picture on the wall.
daybreak777, I think you'll laugh when you see who I had do it.Gaius Baltar
"Fire."
The guns ring out, deafening in the airlock. Gaius forces himself to watch, and Tom and Felix's heads snap forward simultaneously. The ringing echo of the shots dies away slowly, the smoke clearing, and then there is silence.
"Save the chairs," Adama tells one of the Marines. His face is stone, impassive. The Marine nods and steps forward, cutting the two men away and letting their bodies fall to the ground. To Gaius's surprise, a second Marine steps forward and, after a quick glance at Adama, kneels and removes Felix's dogtags. Adama doesn't react.
Gaius feels like he should say something- anything. Step forward and say a few words over the bodies. But somehow, he doubts that the Admiral would allow that. Zarek and Gaeta are traitors, and traitors don't rate funerals, did they? So he bows his head alone, closing his eyes and trying to shut out the picture of the violence.
"Baltar." Tigh's voice is rough and too loud in the aftermath. "Get your ass in gear unless you want to be flushed out the airlock, too."
Gaius jerks back to reality and nods, stepping out of the airlock. There are a few people milling around: Marines who had been guarding the doorway, and a Colonial officer in his duty blues with a white face and stricken eyes. He stands between two Marines, and Gaius can't quite tell if he's being restrained or supported.
The Marine who has the dogtags drops them into the officer's hand without a word. The gesture seems cold, but his silence is respectful; the silence of a soldier handing the folded flag to the widower. The realization of who this officer must be and what he must have meant to Felix comes too late, after Gaius is walking down the hall and away from the man.
I know who you are, Felix.
The words ring in his head, as deafening as the gunshots themselves. And they're true… in their way. He's now painfully aware of just how many specifics he never knew and he stops in his tracks, wondering if he should go back down the corridor to find that officer. Funerals and wakes are for the living, but for once Gaius has the sense to realize that this man won't welcome him with open arms, and his presence would only increase the officer's pain.
Besides, he'd rather be alone right now anyway.
Galactica is full of nooks and crannies and places to hide, and it's not hard to find a locker that was meant to hold foodstuffs but is now empty. He closes the hatch behind him, and when he does, the tears streak his face and he slides down the wall to sit on the cold floor.
He's been charged, entrusted to carry on a legacy. And he has no frakking idea of how to go about doing it.
Well, it's not that he doesn't know. He's got a wireless and an audience. He's written a book before, he can do it again. He could just walk up to people and tell them, hold a public funeral, fight Adama if he really wanted to.
And right now, that would accomplish nothing. Nothing but stirring up more bitterness in the wrong places, and getting his own self killed or tossed in the brig, most likely.
What he should do is put a picture of Felix on the Memorial Wall. The thought seizes him and he jumps to his feet like an eager puppy, even as he imagines the sentimentality of putting Felix's picture next to Adrian's. He's opened the door and halfway down the hall when it hits him.
He doesn't have a picture.
Felix was the closest thing he's had to a friend- Felix was his best friend- since the Colonies fell, and he doesn't have a Goddamned picture of him.
He creeps back to his locker and shuts the door quietly, and he hides.
Noel Allison
The brig door clangs open, and Noel jumps to his feet, heart in his throat. It's not Gaeta or Zarek, but Louis Hoshi. For a wild moment Noel thinks that Felix finally broke down and told Louis, but then he realizes Louis is probably just in here until Adama can question him. He walks over to the bars of his cell, wrapping his hands around the cold metal.
"Louis?"
Louis ignores him, but Noel knows him well enough to know that the set of his shoulders and the way his jaw twitches that he's very aware of him standing there. He tries again. "Louis. What happened to Felix?"
"Dead," Louis bites out. "Firing squad."
"Frak." Noel reels back from the bars, his knees threatening to give out and his stomach clenching. He bats eyes irritably- he is not going to cry. Not right now. "I'm sorry," he says.
"You're sorry?" Louis wheels around, and reaches through the bars. He manages to grab Noel's tanks and yanks him forward. "You're frakking sorry? 'Sorry' doesn't make a damn thing better. It doesn't make a frakking mutiny better. And it doesn't bring him back! Don't give me your frakking 'sorry'!" He pushes Noel away and Noel stumbles until his knees hit the cot in his cell. He sits down, and when he looks, Louis is still standing, arms crossed and eyes blazing.
"You're sorry," he spits out mockingly. "We all took an oath. You took an oath, and I know how frakking much you believed in it. Of all people…" Louis shakes his head in disgust. He started to turn away, and then turned back again.
"And why are you even here? Why is it that you know and I had no frakking clue? You and Felix never said two words to each other until he and I…" he shakes his head again. "Why the frak you?"
"Because he knew damn well we'd probably all end up here!" Noel shouts. "You think he wanted you in here? You think he wanted you in front of that firing squad? Use that frakking head you're so proud of, Louis. Felix made sure that you were safe, not just now but later, when Adama starts asking questions."
"And if I didn't want to be safe?" Louis demands. "I don't need your pity or your protection!"
"Well, then, that would have gone really well for what we were trying to do, wouldn't it?"
Louis glares at him, frustrated, and then storms to the opposite side of his cell. It's footsteps away, but his point is made.
It's then that Noel notices that Louis is clutching a pair of dogtags for all he's worth, and that's when it sinks in that this is real.
He sits back against the wall and huddles in on himself. He didn't expect the news to feel quite like this- Louis is right when he says he and Felix never were friends until Felix got involved with Louis. But they bonded quickly, and there had been nights of cards and smoking and laughter before Felix had left on the Demetrius. With so many friends dead, you cling to the ones who remain pretty tightly.
There's a picture in his rack. It's the three of them, and they're making faces at the camera and drunk out of their minds. He wipes at his face. "Hey, Louis," he says, getting up and moving towards the bars.
Louis doesn't answer- he's pretending to be sleeping. But Noel slept beside him for two years; he damn well knows that Louis is faking it. He sighs. "I know you're awake," he says, "and you don't have to say anything, okay? Just listen. In my locker, on the mirror. There's that picture Cally took of the three of us." He suddenly realizes exactly where this request is going, and he has to cut off to swallow hard. "Put it up on the Memorial Wall, will you? Not just for Felix, but for me."
Louis rolls over and blinks at him for a long time. "Adama's not going to kill you," he says.
"What?"
"Not yet. He killed Felix and Zarek," Louis almost spits the second name, "but he won't kill the rest of you. Not yet. He might need you."
Noel nods, and oddly, finds a part of him envying Felix. It's die now or die later from the sounds of it, in a suicide mission or a last-chance battle. "Well," he says slowly, "hold onto it. And when I die, put it up."
"Whatever," Louis says angrily, and turns over. But Noel knows that means yes.
He sighs and sits back down on the cot. Die now or die later, but it doesn't matter. They're all going to die anyway.
Saul Tigh
The last order of business of the day is dealing with Lieutenant Hoshi. "Go get some rest," Bill tells Saul. "You need it, and I can handle this one on my own."
He's exhausted, but Saul shakes his head. "No, I'll come with you. I can't stand beside him in the CIC unless I'm convinced he doesn't belong in the brig."
"Suit yourself," Bill says.
They walk down toward the brig together, and Saul catches a whiff of alcohol in Bill's wake. But he doesn't say anything, because damn it, he'd really like a drink himself. This is the kind of day that made him start drinking in the first place.
They bring Hoshi out, all anger and fire and clenched hands and trembling. Bill sits down.
"How much did you know about Gaeta's plans?" he demands.
"Nothing," Hoshi spits out. "Absolutely nothing."
Saul raises his eyebrows. "Nothing, sir," he corrects, not unaware of the irony of the last time he made that correction.
"Nothing, sir," Hoshi grinds out, and Bill gets the parallels, too.
"I find that hard to believe, Mr. Hoshi. As I understand it, you and Gaeta were close."
"Yeah, well, I thought so, too." Hoshi looks away, and that's the first indication that something's up.
Bill presses on. "You were romantically involved, am I right?"
"Going to bust me for fraternization now?" Hoshi demands, a bitter laugh punctuating the sentence. "Oh, excuse me. Going to bust me for fraternization now, sir?"
"If you're trying to convince me you're guilty, you're doing a damn good job of it, Lieutenant."
Hoshi winces and looks down. He's angry, but he's broken at the moment, too. Saul finds himself wanting to say something, but keeps quiet for the moment, letting Bill handle it.
"I'm waiting for an answer."
Hoshi sighs. "Sir," he says, sitting back loosely in his chair, "I didn't know anything, except that Felix was angry after you didn't do anything about the Raptor."
"I didn't do anything because investigating put him at risk," Bill growls. "If I started asking questions, I'd have a basestar of Cylons looking for his head."
"I know," Hoshi says, and the grief surfaces a little more. "But he didn't. And he was angry. He told me he was going to do something… but I never thought he'd do this. Never. Not Felix."
"Yeah, well, neither did we," Saul says, and his voice sounds rougher than he thought it would. "But he did."
Hoshi shrugs. "He left me, you know," he says, and the knife comes back to his voice. "Right before he started all this, I'm guessing. A matter of days. Was it really only days?" His voice cracks and he closes his eyes and rubs them, hiding them with his hand. His other hand is still clenched around the dog tags, and that's when Saul realizes that Hoshi is crying. He loved Gaeta, and now he's having to….
He's having to hand him a cup of poison, because no matter how much he loves him, Gaeta betrayed them all, and he has to answer for that.
Bill opens his mouth to speak, but Saul puts a hand on his arm. "He's telling the truth, Bill."
"Really." Bill is skeptical, but Saul is convinced.
"Really."
Bill looks up at him, nods, and then nods at Hoshi. "All right," he tells the lieutenant, "you're free to go. But if we have any reason- and I mean any reason- to suspect you knew about this, you'll be right back in here, and then out the airlock."
Hoshi nods. "Yes, sir."
The look on the lieutenant's face haunts Saul as he walks back to his quarters. When he arrives, Caprica is asleep, looking peaceful despite the exhaustion still obvious on her face. He turns on the light and hesitates as she stirs, and then pours himself a drink and sits down at the desk.
He knows exactly where he put the files, and after he takes a long swallow he reaches for them. Gaeta's is right on top, just like it was when he put them away after the Circle was disbanded. He takes another drink and opens it, and Gaeta smiles out at him from New Caprica, from the CIC, looking twelve years old in his dress grays.
Who took that frakking picture anyway? Saul doesn't remember it, but he should, given that he's standing right there.
It's even later when he realizes he's never going to make sense of any of this by staring at pictures, so he knocks back the rest of the drink and goes to bed.
Caprica Six
Saul's gone when she wakes up, and Caprica worries for him. Yesterday was a nightmare, and today won't be much easier. She shivers, pulling the blanket around her shoulders as she slides from the bed and pads across the cold metal floor.
Something crashes and she jumps, her hand over her stomach protectively.
Whatever it was is routine, and she curses herself for being so jumpy. She never was before. But it's not her life she's scared for, it's the baby. It's always the baby.
Saul left a bottle of liquor opened on his desk, and she goes to cork it, her stomach turning at the smell. But her hand freezes midair, glass stopper balanced delicately between her fingers, when she spots the picture on the desk.
Gaeta.
She picks up a picture slowly, remembering him from New Caprica. All angry eyes and coldness, doing his best to ignore her, especially around Gaius. Gaius, whom they'd both loved so much. Who had let them both down so badly. She wonders if anyone on Galactica knows that he'd had Gaius under his gun and let him go.
She would have shot him, but that was the difference between him and her.
She looks back at the bed where Saul had slept beside her, and then puts the picture down and dresses.
She walks through the halls of Galactica, carrying the picture and not quite sure where she's going with it. There are signs of the mutiny everywhere; bloodstains and bullet holes, grief and anger and tears. She stops abruptly and stares at a hole in the wall, and nearly collides with someone.
"Oh, I'm sorry," she says, and then realizes that it's Helo. "Shouldn't you be in sickbay?" The wound on his head looks terrible.
"Not particularly comfortable away from Sharon and Hera," he says, and she nods. He turns his head and looks at the bullet hole in the wall. "I can't believe it. I still can't turn it over in my head."
"It is hard to fathom," she agrees, but Helo's miles away.
"He was my friend," he tells Caprica. "Gaeta, I mean. I never… I know I made the call not to get him back to the Galactica, but to take it out on Sharon and Hera…."
He's hurting, so she puts a hand on his arm. As she does so, she notices an officer walking down the hall towards them. His pace slows, and he's watching them with wide eyes. "He's always been good at hiding," she tells Helo. "He fooled us all on New Caprica, humans and Cylons alike. There was no way you could have known. No way you could have seen this coming."
"No?" Helo bends in, and the officer that's been approaching has stopped completely now. "Maybe I could have seen it coming, if I had taken the frakking time to look. In two weeks he lost his leg, we lost Earth, and he lost Dee, and was on that Raptor. Maybe I should have seen it coming, if I was such a good friend."
"That doesn't justify what he did," Caprica says. The officer standing behind Helo has his jaw clenched, and she notices dark circles under his red eyes. She turns away from him. "He tried to kill Hera." She sees Helo's muscles strain.
"No," the officer says, and Helo spins around. Whatever he was about to say dies on his lips. "He didn't try to kill Hera," the officer says quietly. "He wouldn't have locked her up if that was the case. He would have just killed her, and he wouldn't do that."
The tendons in Helo's neck stand out, and Caprica realizes that he's restraining himself. The officer doesn't stare him down. Instead, he ducks his head, mumbles an apology, and continues down the hall, picking up speed as he goes.
"Helo?" she asks, and he turns back to her.
"Sorry," he says through clenched teeth. He takes a deep breath, and then glances back at in the officer's direction, who's now disappeared around a corner. "Look, I need to get home to Sharon and Hera, okay? Be careful, and I'll see you around."
He walks away, and she wonders for a second if he's going after that officer. But no, he turns the opposite direction. She looks down at the picture again.
This man almost brought about Hera's death. She understands his bitterness, but nothing justifies that. She crumples the picture in her hand and drops it into the nearest receptacle. And then she continues on.
Bill Adama
The CIC hatch opens. Bill looks up, expecting Lee, but it's not. It's Hoshi, creeping in and staring down at the CIC quietly, as if he expects the room to blow up as he walks in. Bill watches him for a moment and then turns away. He can't afford to let this time be any different than the others. It's like ripping off a bandage. The first time will hurt, but then after that it will be okay.
"Take your station, Mr. Hoshi," he says, gesturing to the tactical station.
"Yes sir."
Every eye in the CIC is following Hoshi down to the tactical station, and when he glances at him, Bill can tell he knows it, too. His chin is raised defiantly and his shoulders are squared, but as he passes, Bill realizes he's avoiding looking at anyone. He takes his seat, and although the CIC never really paused, the unspoken rhythm starts up again, like a machine rolling back into operation.
Years of serving with Tigh have taught him how to surreptitiously drink on duty, and he manages to take a swig from his flask. Everyone thinks that this is easy, that only anger propels him and he can banish Felix Gaeta from his mind with no effort. But the truth is he has to be careful or he'll call the wrong name, and that every time Hoshi speaks, he expects to hear Gaeta's voice. The truth is that he sees Gaeta's eyes in front of him constantly, accusing and angry, hears him yelling that he loves this ship more than he loves the people on it. He doesn't say a word about it, because his crew needs him to pretend he doesn't care, but it's there.
Hours pass, and then finally the door opens and Lee comes in. He looks professional and assured, although the nerves are there under his polished surface. Bill can see it in the dishevelment of his hair and the way his tie is loosened.
"What have you got?" he asks, without preamble.
Lee opens a folder. He's organized, and he takes Bill through his list of questions and concerns as fast as he can. These aren't the big issues, not the ones that have to be discussed behind closed doors, and so it's easy to fire back and forth.
At least, it's easy until a scrap of paper flutters to the ground.
Bill picks it up, staring at it. It's a picture of Zarek and Gaeta on New Caprica, Zarek's arm around Gaeta's shoulders as they both smile at the camera. He swallows hard. "You brought this into the CIC?"
Lee's stare is penetrating; he's not fooled like everyone else pretends to be. "I found it while I was cleaning out the Vice President's office," he says. "It was the only picture he had in there."
"I find that hard to believe." Bill sets the picture down on the table. The light behind it makes it look ethereal, and he looks away from it. A mistake, because he finds himself looking directly at Hoshi, and he realizes that there is nowhere this CIC that he can look without feeling guilty. "What are you going to do with it?"
Lee shrugs. "I thought that someone might want to put it on the Memorial Wall."
"You weren't thinking me, I hope." The words taste sour on his lips, and this time he doesn't hide the swig he takes. And Lee doesn't hide the disapproval in his eyes.
"I wasn't thinking of anyone," Lee says, and hoists himself into his presidential posture. But Bill knows he was meant to see the picture, meant to offer. Maybe Lee thought it would give him some peace, maybe Lee thought it was something the Admiral should do. Either way, Lee was wrong.
"Is there anything else?" Bill asks.
"No."
"Then we're done here." He turns back to the CIC table, raises his chin defiantly, squares his shoulders, and avoids looking at anyone.
Lee Adama
He should have known better than to expect anything from his father. Lee sighs. Some sense of fairness dictates that he should understand, that the wounds are too raw. And yet, one day can't erase years of feeling, and Lee knows that just as well as anyone else in this Fleet.
He stands in the Memorial Hall and looks at the picture. Tom Zarek was… what was he to Lee? A mentor, of a sort, although Lee never wanted to be the kind of politician Zarek was. Just the kind that Zarek wanted to see himself as.
A father figure? In a strange way, Lee had once believed that, until he'd found this picture. There is something about Zarek's stance that is relaxed and easy, and something about the way he stands with Gaeta that is… well, Lee can't put his finger on it except to say that now he knows "father figure" isn't the right term.
Funny that he finds himself envying Felix Gaeta over that one, just a little.
Whatever he was, Zarek had been someone in his life, and Lee wants to honor that, even as he wants to forget it forever. There is no better way than to leave the man's picture on a wall he doesn't have to look at and doesn't have to walk past.
He takes the picture between his fingers, ready to tear it in two.
"Don't."
Lee stops. "Lieutenant Hoshi."
"Sir… please. Don't tear it."
"You saw the picture?" Lee asks, a little wary. He's known about Gaeta and Hoshi since they began, because it was back when Dee was still with him. And now Hoshi's standing here in front of him, and he nods.
"Ididn't see it. I knew it existed. Felix told me, a while back." He shakes his head in frustration. "I didn't know that you'd bring it over here, but when I heard the Admiral mention the picture, it wasn't hard to guess which one he meant."
"Yeah, well…" Lee shrugs. "I thought maybe someone would have put a picture up by now." He draws a breath in as he looks at the wall. "Unless I missed it, I was wrong."
Hoshi looks forward, eyes fixed on the wall in a way that suggests if he looks at Lee, he's not going to finish his sentence. "I have four pictures of Felix," he says. Lee looks down at Hoshi's hands and realizes he's holding them. The one on top is a picture of the two of them together, Hoshi behind Gaeta, arms wrapped around him, Gaeta's hands over his, and both of them laughing. "I don't really want to give them up…" Hoshi looks down at the pictures.
There's something in the way he looks at Lee then that reminds Lee of days on the Pegasus. Days when he was a commanding officer, someone who was entrusted with the responsibility of his soldiers. And he realizes that this man has no one to grieve with, that he's bearing his loss alone.
He nods, fumbling for words because there's nothing that's right to say. He takes the pictures from Hoshi and looks at them. The one he saw, a picture of Gaeta in a flight suit shaking an older officer's hand, Gaeta in civilian clothes in Joe's, and a picture of Hoshi, Narcho, and Gaeta all making ludicrous drunken faces at the camera. Hoshi stares at them helplessly, and Lee realizes as he looks through them that these are the only four pictures that Hoshi has.
He hands them back, closing Hoshi's hand around them. "Come on," he says, extending the untorn picture of Zarek and Gaeta. "Let's find a place for them."
They choose an out of the way corner, Lee pins the picture there. Tom and Felix smile at them, hopeful and alive in the sun of a new world. Hoshi smiles, reaches out, and touches the picture softly, and for a moment, he's at peace.
There are bootsteps, and they both pull away from the wall and from each other. A deckhand glances at them as she passes by, headed to a different part of the Hall. But the moment is broken, and Hoshi just nods at Lee, and then turns and walks away.
Lee watches him go, and then turns and walks the other way.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2009-03-17 04:33 am (UTC)I
demandrequest some kinda crack to balance me out please.no subject
Date: 2009-03-17 06:29 pm (UTC)Thanks!
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Date: 2009-03-17 09:59 pm (UTC)I should email you a scan of the autograph AJ gave me; it inspired![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
blue_crow to start writing something for me, maybe it'll inspire you as well?? XDXDXDno subject
Date: 2009-03-18 12:50 am (UTC)I have an idea for the birthday fic, but I just haven't written it yet. Soon!
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Date: 2009-03-17 04:42 am (UTC)Thank you for this. A few of your fics came up in conversation last weekend and I think I have some backtracking to do.
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Date: 2009-03-17 06:30 pm (UTC)And I look forward to you backtracking! :) ::grins::
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Date: 2009-03-25 10:54 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-03-17 05:12 am (UTC)You never cease to bring tears to my eyes. Louis :( That he doesn't have enough pictures of Felix makes me want to cry.
Bill can go to hell. (No, I will never forgive him, why do you ask?)
Baltar not having any pictures at all made so much sad sense.
And I will have you know that I may be writing that Hoshi and Baltar funeral fic after all. I don't know if funeral is exactly the right word... But it's something.
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Date: 2009-03-17 06:32 pm (UTC)I liked the idea that he didn't have a lot of pictures. They probably weren't together THAT long, and I imagine that paper was getting harder to get.
And I kind of feel the same about Bill, although Daybreak and watching the special last night helped. I used to love Bill so, so much....
YES! HOSHI AND BALTAR FUNERAL (or whatever) FIC! GODDESS!!! :)
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Date: 2009-03-18 02:20 am (UTC)I am making myself cry. I don't know if it will have that effect on anyone else, but I'm really surprise by the way I'm reacting to writing this. I thought I got it all out of my system with my other mourning fic.
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Date: 2009-03-17 09:20 am (UTC)Aww! I thought you'd have Caprica do it, like that Six we saw on screen. But Lee! It means more because maybe Lee understood what Felix was trying to do. It's not just about remembering our guy. It's about remembering what he stood for.
Gosh! I didn't think I had any anger left! Your story had made me all woobie and annoyed. But yes, Lee is an excellent choice even if it never happens on screen.
Thank you.
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Date: 2009-03-17 06:37 pm (UTC)You know, I was close to having Caprica do it. But I thought first of all that would really bug Felix (which is probably a GREAT reason to do it), but more than that, she would have been angry at the threat to her baby and to Hera. If the kids hadn't been threatened, I think she might have been the one.
But yeah, I actually was pleased with Lee during the mutiny arc. He didn't agree with what they were doing, but he agreed with why and was frustrated his father wasn't getting why people weren't happy about this.
Thanks!
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Date: 2009-03-17 09:28 am (UTC)Oh, Hoshi, you poor lamb.
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Date: 2009-03-17 06:38 pm (UTC)I know. I feel so bad for poor Hoshi. I'm guessing everyone who used to care about Felix is dead or hating him or in prison right now, except for Hoshi, who's probably just a mess. ::hugs Hoshi with his sad puppy dog eyes::
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Date: 2009-03-17 10:24 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-03-17 06:39 pm (UTC)So, did you fall for him? Pretty boy not allowed to have nice things?? >:)
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Date: 2009-03-17 07:19 pm (UTC)And oh, OH GAETA. I cannot help but love him, really.
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Date: 2009-03-17 07:48 pm (UTC)And I KNOW. I think anyone who's a Remus/Sirius shipper can't help but adore him. He's just that type, and knowing he's doomed doesn't help. ::Sigh:: (Also helped by the impression that the actor is a genuine sweetheart, and that Gaeta is the little black dress of BSG fandom.)
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Date: 2009-03-17 12:38 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-03-17 06:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-03-17 01:02 pm (UTC)Random detail: love how Adama was drinking on duty. He's falling apart, and it's showing. I really don't like him anymore.
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Date: 2009-03-17 06:44 pm (UTC)The thing that killed me about the Lee section was that he wasn't even going to put Gaeta's picture up- just Zarek's, at first. I don't necessarily begrudge him that, they weren't at all close and Gaeta did almost kill his dad. He only did it because he realized that Hoshi was completely alone in this, and he does have some attachment to Hoshi in my head as he was Hoshi's commanding officer for a while.
I've been hating Adama from SaGN to Daybreak. Daybreak I started liking him a bit more (but more Laura), and I think the special last night helped a lot. I used to love the character so much....
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Date: 2009-03-17 02:06 pm (UTC)I loved the Gaius section, of course. It speaks of his self obession that he doesn't have a photo of the man he considers to be his best friend. It also felt true to character that Helo would be understanding and forgiving (especially since he was with Tyrol) I also liked the reflection that Zarek might have chosen Felix as a replacement Lee. Have you noticed that Baltar seems to be turning to Lee as a replacement Felix too?
Great work as always (even though you hurt me!) Please can we have a fic from you where Felix is alive soon? I miss your Felix characterisation!
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Date: 2009-03-17 06:48 pm (UTC)Realistically, I do wonder if having to kill Felix has been contributing to Adama's breakdowns. I also think that there was a lot of truth in what Felix said, and they've been showing us that. The moment I really thought Ron might actually be acknowledging it but subtly was when Adama looked at the Admiral pins in his hands. There is no way that scene could not have been designed to recall Felix doing the same thing.
Have you noticed that Baltar seems to be turning to Lee as a replacement Felix too?
Eek! Don't give me thoughts like this! I have enough fics lined up to write! :)
Thanks. And I promise that my next fic won't have Felix dead by the end of the chapter. (I'll probably take YFL all the way through to the execution, but a.) I suspect it's going to end up being 2-3 chapters, and b.) I want to put an afterlife epilogue on the end, because I am corny and cheesy.)
I can't promise it will be cheerful, but he'll be alive :)
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Date: 2009-03-18 01:55 am (UTC)Poor sad Hoshi. :(
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Date: 2009-03-19 02:44 am (UTC)Honestly, I wasn't expecting Lee, either. I wanted it to be someone you wouldn't expect (aka not Hoshi), but I couldn't find someone who felt right. And the funny thing is, I think Lee has utterly no real attachment to Gaeta. They weren't friends, they didn't work that much together... in my head he did this because he used to be Hoshi's commanding officer, and he recognized that Hoshi was completely alone. (And somewhere, deep inside, was kicking himself for the shitty way he brushed right by Gaeta outside the morgue.)
Glad you enjoyed it!
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Date: 2009-03-20 08:11 pm (UTC)The image of poor Hoshi standing in the Memorial Hall with his four photos in his hands, heartsick about giving any of them up, made me tear up. Here's to hoping Hoshi does end up as admiral--he'll make sure Felix gets a fair, complete characterization in the Colonial history books.
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Date: 2009-03-18 10:46 pm (UTC)Still hate Adama. They have two hours to make me like him again and it would take a miracle for it to happen.
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Date: 2009-03-19 02:45 am (UTC)Yeah, I'm still pissed at Adama too, and the way he treated Helo last episode totally did not help. What killed me though? That special. Because it reminded me how much I used to LOVE Adama, pre-Earth. ::Sigh::
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Date: 2009-03-19 02:19 am (UTC)You are so good. I am in awe.
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Date: 2009-03-19 02:50 am (UTC)I keep telling myself we haven't seen that many closeups of the wall, and Felix is just on a part we haven't seen since he died. But as I was thinking about it, everyone who loved Felix is either a.) dead, b.) incarcerated, c.) spitting on his grave, or d.) Hoshi. Am I right that it's only a matter of days between the webisodes and the mutiny?
Glad you enjoyed it!
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Date: 2009-03-20 05:43 pm (UTC)Aw, Gaius is caring. But too little, too late.
I adore your Noel.
I think I'm going to steal him.Bill can go drown in an ambrosia barrel now, thxbai.
Lee just thinking about Zarek killed me.
"Yeah, well…" Lee shrugs. "I thought maybe someone would have put a picture up by now." He draws a breath in as he looks at the wall. "Unless I missed it, I was wrong."
Or in one word: "Ooops." ;.;
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Date: 2009-03-23 01:47 am (UTC)Feel free to steal Noel. I'm quite fond of him- I'd love to see him around more :)
Lee just thinking about Zarek killed me.
I'm SO glad someone finally commented on that. I loved that bit, and I'm glad someone else did, too.
Thanks!
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Date: 2009-03-23 12:56 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-03-23 01:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-03-23 06:31 pm (UTC)1.) Are you going to go for it?
and
2.) Do you need help if you are? I'd be happy to give you a hand! (And if you're not, I may try to do it myself.)
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Date: 2009-03-23 11:21 pm (UTC)Our first post about it was here. We made it a lot more low-key than the big remix that
The masterlist of everything that eventually had a remix posted is here. The good thing about keeping a low-key challenge is that there's less stress for the moderator(s). The bad thing is that not everyone who writes a remix actually gets a remix story.
I honestly hadn't thought about doing it again, but I think it's a great idea--a nice way to keep some activity in BSG fandom now that the show is over. Since you're already interested (and I know Allie is busy with grad school), maybe we could run it together? I can check with the
eta: Oh, and if you feel like doing it yourself, go right ahead! I'm on offer but not going to insist on jumping in if you want to try it alone./eta
(It's helpful to have two people check over things when planning this stuff out. Allie and I hadn't done anything like it before, but we managed to stumble through it together.)
Let me know what you think. And we can shift this over to e-mail if you prefer: rosegriffes at gmail dot com
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Date: 2009-03-25 10:51 pm (UTC)Awww, Hoshi.
I love that you have Helo not angry about it, either. Because I so want him to have this reaction, even though it's just as likely that he's ready to spit bullets over the endangerment of his women.
*still wants to kick Adama in the face*
This is beautiful. *sniffle* WHY CAN'T SOMEONE HAVE PINNED UP (or walked by) A DAMNED PICTURE ON THE SHOW?!?!!
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Date: 2009-03-26 02:30 am (UTC)In my head, Helo IS angry about it, but at the same time he's fair-minded enough to get that a.) Gaeta didn't want them dead, or he would have killed them, and b.) this was brewing and people should have seen it coming. It doesn't excuse it, but I like the idea that (especially after being brushed off by Adama) there's a part of Helo that understands why Felix snapped. He's angry, but eventually he'll forgive.
And yeah, would it have KILLED them?????? Honestly!
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Date: 2009-04-09 12:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-04-09 11:50 am (UTC)I wish we knew what happened to Narcho. He wasn't in the finale. I actually kind of like the idea that he was one of the few other mutineers executed as well. Or that he and Hoshi hooked back up after a while on Earth ;)
Thanks again!