Razor

[lls_mutant]

Okay, let's talk BSG and Razor.

No... not that Razor. Let's talk about razors.

Let me give you a few scenes here, and tell me what you notice about them:

1.) After four months of captivity, a perfectly clean shaven Tom Zarek climbs on a truck with Laura Roslin.

2.) After three YEARS of captivity, Bulldog tumbles out of a Raider. He's got long hair and dreadlocks, but his face is clean shaven.

3.) After 18 months of captivity, Ellen Tigh puts on a sleevelss, tea-length black dress. Her legs and armpits are perfectly smooth.

4.) After an unknown number of days- but long enough for her to get very hungry- Gina- tied and laying on the floor- still has perfectly smooth legs. Given that the Cylons mimicked the good and bad of human anatomy and female hair isn't a "bad" so much as a "undesirable in American societies", I'm going to assume that Cylons had similar hair growth patterns. However, I will say it's possible that Gina waxed recently.

Honestly- are the only people in this fleet that grow hair Adama and Baltar? Oh, Tigh grows it, too. But please note that no one else seems to, either.

Oh, and you know why poor Cally was probably so bitchy to Boomer in the New Caprica cell? Well, Nicky was only a few months old. I doubt they had a ton of formula on New Caprica, so Cally was probably breastfeeding. And by the time that Boomer saw her, she was probably majorly engorged. That hurts. A LOT. I'd be a cranky mess, too. (Plus, she was gone long enough that it probably played major havoc on her milk supply.)

But seriously- why IS Cavil so willing to give his captives razors? (I suppose they wouldn't be much threat to a Centurion, but still.) These are the thoughts that confound me as I work on my big bang.

Comments

[blue-crow.livejournal.com]

Probably an oversight. That or laser hair removal is much more popular/practical in Colonial society than American- I'm willing to say any self-respecting Six living in the colonies would have gotten it, possibly likewise to Ellen. That might actually cover the women.

The men? I have no idea. I imagine in most of those cases it would have taken a lot of time (and warning) for the actor to grow the beard he should have had in the scene (seemingly only Callis was the one willing to grow some serious facial hair for himself.) I think a few of the other men get sort of stubbly but nobody gets full on facial hair like Bill and Gaius. Though false mustaches are probably a lot quicker to find and apply than a custom beard for a quick scene that probably no one would even notice (except upon this kind of analysis) or for a useless character like Bulldog.

[lls-mutant.livejournal.com]

Heh. I know. I just find it funny. They gave Bulldog dreads, but no facial hair.

Tigh and Tyrol do manage to pull out beards on NC, which I'd forgotten.

Ah well- it amuses me! :) (Also, things like why Zarek was wearing brand spanking new Velcro sneakers when he was about to be executed.)

[prophetkristy.livejournal.com]

heeee.

FWIW, Carl Lumbly actually had those dreads himself. (I hated them on Alias, they totally did not fit his character.)

[grey-sw.livejournal.com]

Ha ha, these are the sorts of things you can't think about too much! For all the show's "realism", everybody on BSG had Symbolic Hair(tm) which did exactly what the writers wanted it to. Especially Baltar.

Same thing with issues of supply: how come Doc Cottle still has endless cigarettes four years after the exodus? How many different dresses did Laura Roslin pack for one decommissioning ceremony, anyway? Why is it that they still have so much booze, and not just the Chief's home-distilled kind, either? How exactly did Lee get so fat? Or the Chief -- he sure gained an impressive amount of weight on nothing but algae during the last season! :P

Realistically, they should all be skinny, half-starved, habitually filthy, dressed in ill-fitting rags, and piloting jerry-rigged ships which no longer work reliably. That level of realism would make for poor television, though! BSG bucked the trend to a surprising extent, but everybody on TV still has to be attractive, even after the apocalypse.

But seriously- why IS Cavil so willing to give his captives razors?

heh, I'll bet you it's Doral. "Oh, hello, I thought I'd come by to rip your eye out... but first, you are so scruffy and I just can't stand it! Hold still!"

[lls-mutant.livejournal.com]

Heh. Some of them I can make work- Laura buying dresses off people who were tourists and had more on them, or Lee having a really slow metabolism and neglecting working out. But yeah, stinky and skinny isn't very pretty, unless they get a shower later. (I mean, even the sewage ship managed to provide us with serious arm porn.)

And yeah- I could see that about Doral! Heheh.

[rebelliousrose2.livejournal.com]

Actually, no to the habitually filthy. As long as there is access to proteins, they can always have a rudimentary soap available, and there's plenty of water.

Clothing I can finesse a bit- they've lost a LOT of people (crap that got left on New Cap aside, and don't get me started on that) and I assume that even with a limited clothing supply, there's going to be personal items and clothing going begging. We never met Galactica's quartermaster, but I bet that he was one of those hoarders.

Imagine a murder mystery over the last bottle of perfume in the universe.

Helo, Gaeta, and Hot Dog all have had stubble on Galactica at times.

[grey-sw.livejournal.com]

Actually, no to the habitually filthy. As long as there is access to proteins, they can always have a rudimentary soap available, and there's plenty of water.

I always sorta questioned the "plenty of water" part, though they definitely portrayed it that way. Seems like the figures given in 33 suggest that they should have been searching for water all the time, not just in that episode... they had all of four possible water stops in the whole show (33, Kobol, New Caprica, and the Algae Planet). It doesn't seem like enough, when you compare the four-year water needs of 50,000 people to the number of water tanks they'd have had. Or maybe there's a convenient water ship they forgot to mention. :P

You're right about the soap -- now I want to see a fic about the Galactica's soapmakers! :)

[lls-mutant.livejournal.com]

I figure that the reason it was a problem in Water was because the tanks were blown so prematurely. Probably normally they noticed the tank, found a convenient comet or whathaveyou, and loaded up uneventfully. But there are huge gaps in lots of spots of canon, so it can easily work.

But yeah, soap makers... It could go in that perfume mystery.

[lls-mutant.livejournal.com]

Imagine a murder mystery over the last bottle of perfume in the universe.

This... this could work. Really, really, really well.

I mean, seriously. It's an opportunity for tons of OCs or- OR PEGASUS! You know what would be really fascinating? Using one of the really nasty Pegasus characters (like Gage) as the detective. (Make it aftershave.) But this could be really, really neat. ::thinks on it.::

Oh, btw- I don't know if you saw it, but since you're probably the biggest Helo-Gaeta fan I know, I figured I'd mention it- I finally wrote my Helo shoves Gaeta in a locker fic: Freaks and Geeks (http://community.livejournal.com/frak_that/7587.html) It doesn't bash Helo at all, btw, and while I didn't intend it, I definitely smirked thinking "subtext galore here" when I reread it :)

Gaeta's stubble is the reason I let him have a razor on the basestar in my fic. That man should stay clean shaven!!!!!

[lls-mutant.livejournal.com]

Imagine a murder mystery over the last bottle of perfume in the universe.

Do you mind if I write this for my femgenficathon fic? It's not quite exactly this, but the bottle of perfume plays into my idea. It's an Ellen and Cain fic :)

[rebelliousrose2.livejournal.com]

Darlin', you know you can use any idea I have anytime and I'd be honored.

I'm in Pottstown, BTW. I hate Pottstown....

[grey-sw.livejournal.com]

Oh, I forgot to mention: I think Ellen doesn't quite fit with the others. She was a prisoner, but Cavil was clearly treating her well (she had fresh food, a bed, pen and paper, a nice red room to live in, etc.), so it would be surprising if she didn't have a bathroom with all the usual amenities.

Zarek and Bulldog are bizarre, though.

[lls-mutant.livejournal.com]

This is true. And Baltar even had a decent cell. And actually, I can even make Zarek make sense. In YFL, I had the prisoners that were going to be executed be given one last shower in a last-rites sort of way, kind of thinking of the showers in the concentration camps. So Tom HAD a full beard until Cavil did this.

And then he was provided with spiffy brand new Velcro running shoes :)

[brennanspeaks.livejournal.com]

Tyrol was also bearded from LDYB through Precipice. I thought they did okay with the men getting scruffy, aside from the two examples you mentioned (hey, maybe Richard Hatch can't grow a beard? Or maybe he knew it the New Caprica arc would be the only one to paint him in a sympathetic light and didn't want to look scruffy while doing it?), but the women . . . fail. I guess only beautiful women who are abnormally hairless get to serve on battlestars.

[lls-mutant.livejournal.com]

I forgot about Tyrol's beard. Thanks!

I actually don't mind that the women are hairless on battlestars (well, more on that in a second), because you don't even really need shave gel- you can shave with just water. So as long as they have a razor and water, that's fine with me.

However, that being said, Ron Moore can shut up about gender blind societies, because every woman we saw in a tank had shaved pits, and I'm pretty sure the men didn't. Also, the women wore makeup when dressing up, and the men did not. So yeah, it's not THAT genderblind!

[brennanspeaks.livejournal.com]

Dressing up? Frak, Dee sometimes wore makeup in her duty blues (which doesn't really make sense for someone so innately gorgeous to begin with, but . . .) Oh, well.

[kappamaki33.livejournal.com]

Aw, don't you just love refrigerator logic like that? :P I've got nothing on that one. I kind of like grey_sw's idea that it's Doral doing it, thinking that hygiene is the best form of criminal rehabilitation. ;)

[lls-mutant.livejournal.com]

I'm thinking I just might use it later. I sort of foreshadowed it anyway, and I can find a way to work a razor in later.... :)

I'll send you anything new I've got by the time I go to bed tonight :)

[brennanspeaks.livejournal.com]

Darn you and your referencing TV tropes, causing me to while away three hours on *that* site. (And only remember after rereading your comment why I skipped on over in the first place o_O ;)

[kappamaki33.livejournal.com]

Hee hee, sorry about that. That website is terribly addictive. There should be a 12-step program, really. ;)

[tin-o-biscuits.livejournal.com]

Gaeta grew cuuuuurls~ and Badass Sideburns... But he totally has grooming supplies horded. Totally.

IDK what to say other than, who'd wanna watch a show about a bunch of gross hairy people? XD Kidding... Ooh, maybe Gaeta attacks people with his horded clippers and whatnot.

[lls-mutant.livejournal.com]

I think that's near canon that Gaeta hoarded grooming supplies. Especially whatever he uses on his hair.

And I think he might attack someone with his hoarded razor. Hey- it's just his weapon size. Pen, scalpel... razor makes sense.

[tin-o-biscuits.livejournal.com]

Oh dear, you've given me mental images of Sweeney Todd Gaeta...


(mmm, AJ singing "My Friends"... :3)

[safenthecity.livejournal.com]

Dude.

Yes.

(He said he wanted to do Sondheim, right? RIGHT?)

[rose-griffes.livejournal.com]

*giggles*

Of course, whole groups of people don't have facial hair. Lots of the tribes native to North America were beardless/mustachless until the Spaniards came along and mixed their genes into the pool. Some still are. Genetic grab bag, I suppose.

Anyway, this is totally the kind of speculation I can get hung up on too. For days I was trying to figure out how Martha on Doctor Who kept her hair straight (she's black) for the two months she was 'marooned' in 1913. Then I decided she had a stash of hair relaxer, tampons and other stuff on the TARDIS, and she was really careful about rationing. And now I need to go look up if they had dental floss in 1913.
shared nerdiness, woohoo!

[lls-mutant.livejournal.com]

This is an interesting point- I never thought about that aspect. Hmmm.

I have decided that the women on BSG used diva cups (which would have made sense in space anyway), so that takes care of the period issue. I've also decided that they opt for hormone shots, which explains why Cottle doesn't need an entire raptor full of birth control pills. Razors can last forever and you don't HAVE to have gel or cream to shave, even if Adama was hoarding all the soap and toothpaste.

We are all such geeks :)

[daybreak777.livejournal.com]

Then I decided she had a stash of hair relaxer, tampons and other stuff on the TARDIS, and she was really careful about rationing.
Heee! You guys and details! That made me giggle. I was impressed with Rose on Lost, though. I think that she either let her hair go natural or is wearing a natural-looking wig. Either way it makes sense!

Did you read the fic with Cally and Kara and the shortage of tampons?

[lls-mutant.livejournal.com]

OMG- NO!!!! Link, please!!!!!!!!

[daybreak777.livejournal.com]

It's short, but funny. Women's Issues by meyerlemon. Enjoy!

[rose-griffes.livejournal.com]

The link's not working. :( But I think I did read that story.

Heee! You guys and details! That made me giggle.
Hey, I got almost 2000 words of fic just over wondering how Kara and Romo managed to get Sam to sickbay. Just the way my mind works... can't write unless I know how.

I was impressed with Rose on Lost, though. I think that she either let her hair go natural or is wearing a natural-looking wig. Either way it makes sense!

Huh. Now I'm trying to remember how her hair looked when the plane first went down. Can't remember that far back. Wow, we've already had five seasons of that show...

[daybreak777.livejournal.com]

Here is the link again.

http://meyerlemon.livejournal.com/55225.html#cutid1

Everyone should have a chance to read and laugh! It's funny, I think at the beginning of the series people wrote more 'explain the details' fic. I know, for me, after awhile I just handwaved or just accepted fanon explanations. :-)

[safenthecity.livejournal.com]

AHAHHAAH. That's an absolutely fabulous observation, and as to asnwers- I have no idea. If you come up with something, I'll be glad to see it.

[lls-mutant.livejournal.com]

I've got no clue on Bulldog.

Ellen is easiest, because as grey_sw pointed out, Cavil was physically treating her well enough.

Zarek I went for the whole "last rites" thing in YFL.

Gina I can explain away with wax.

But Bulldog is a mystery. ::sigh::

[ivanolix.livejournal.com]

Like Kara's magically-quick growing hair and Hera's strange growth spurt pattern, I handwave all of this as television conceit. There are some things they can't make realistic, because they're not dealing with characters, they're dealing with actors portraying them.

That being said, I'll be interested if you find a way to have a reason in canon for this. ;-)

[lls-mutant.livejournal.com]

True enough! But it's still annoying as anything at times :) Although, granted, I can understand, because I've seen Gaeta unshaven and let's just say give the man a razor!!!!

[prophetkristy.livejournal.com]

heheheheheh.

This is a good question. (Felix got a little stubbly on the Demetrius...)

[lls-mutant.livejournal.com]

Which is part of why he got a razor in my fic. Felix stubbly is NOT a good thing.

[daybreak777.livejournal.com]

Heee! You are so funny! I totally handwave all the details, but you really think about them. Hell, if anyone had given Gina a razor I sure know what she would have done with it!

I never asked myself why the Sixes' legs were clean shaven. It would be like asking why they are so beautiful and coiffed. I think they were genetically designed to be hairless. Ellen would have taken care of that for sure. And heck, you know the Cylons have a beauty salon on the basestar! Run by the same Centurion tailors that made all the leather for everybody in Revelations!

Hee! My favorite inconsistency was when Chiefy came in unbeared in a pickup scene in Exodus, I think. "They took Cally!" He kept shouting but I kept thinking, "Where'd your beard go?"

Like Tin, I adored Felix's season 3 and 4 curls, but the boy must have been hording some hair product away somewhere. I won't question it though, because the boy looked good!

[rebelliousrose2.livejournal.com]

One of the funniest things ever said by Jacob on TWOP before he became a douche and began believing his own press was; "So freaked out is Chief that he seems to have shaved? And moisturized? before rescuing Cally."

[daybreak777.livejournal.com]

So freaked out is Chief that he seems to have shaved? And moisturized? before rescuing Cally.
Hee! Chiefy was looking a bit shiny! I bet the NC Police confiscated all beauty products when they rounded people up. I know people were holding out! Razors, moisturizers, after NC it was the true beginning of the beauty product end!

[rose-griffes.livejournal.com]

Hee! My favorite inconsistency was when Chiefy came in unbeared in a pickup scene in Exodus, I think. "They took Cally!" He kept shouting but I kept thinking, "Where'd your beard go?"

Hah. "He was so freaked out, his beard fell off!" That was my silly justification, since I noticed it as well. Especially since they showed him with the beard in the 'previously on' section!

[lls-mutant.livejournal.com]

The beard!!!

I'm wondering if it was supposed to be symbolic of how he now felt alive and purposeful. But maybe it was just "oooh- since the baby's come we haven't had much time for nookie, but if I save her, I get RESCUE SEX!!!!! I'd better shave!!!!"

You know, I totally bet that was it.

And yeah, Felix was definitely hoarding grooming supplies. It also explains why Hoshi's hair improved after he hooked up with Felix and then Felix died- the supply went to Hoshi.