Mother Post Again
Nov. 1st, 2005 10:29 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lls_mutantI should be working on my paper, or failing that, some fics or reviews. But instead, I am procrastinating by typing up my birth plan. If you aren't interested in birthing, skip on by- no fandom or other writing stuff in this post.
Moms and medical type people: is there anything I'm missing? Anything I should include? Anything you can look at me and say "you're absolutely bonkers"? Anything I DON'T need to include? I'm pretty flexible with my birth plan. What it really amounts to is "get my baby here safely." (Heh. I read this one book called "Diary of a Mad Mom-to-be", and the quote was "Amy's birth plan: Short. Painless.") I know I need to show it to Howard, but any other thoughts from people who've been there?
Thanks!
My general thoughts on giving birth and how I want it handled are very, very simple: you are the doctor and nurses. You are the ones who know how to do this. You tell me what to do, and I will do it. IVs, monitoring, oxytocin, Cesarean, episiotomy, forceps… you know best.
As for the more optional aspects:
Drugs: Right now, I am very hesitant to have an epidural. This is simply because having a needle in my back scares me half to death- more than the actual birthing process does (as do catheters). However, ask me in the middle of labor. I have no moral or ethical objections to pain relief, and I suspect my fear will be overcome by pain. What I say in labor is my real answer.
However, the only sort of pain relief I want is an epidural. Please, nothing that plays with my mind- I want to be cognizant for the delivery. (Unless, of course, there is some other medical reason that I need other forms of pain medication.)
General movement: If I have not had an epidural, I would like to be able to move about, if possible.
Delivery position: If at all possible, I'd really like to be able to grab on to something aside from my husband's hand (in order to save his hand). In the videos they showed us, one woman was kind of gripping/clinging to a bar that went over her bed. I'm not sure that that's possible, but if it is, that might be more comfortable for me.
Mirror Use: Please ask us then!
People in the room: Since this is my first, I would prefer that no interns (nursing or doctor) observe this birth. The fewer people, the better. As far as non-medical personnel, the ONLY person I want in the room is my husband, Howard. I would like this to be the case until I am cleaned up and, if the baby needs to be fed right away, until the first feeding is done. The only exception to this is if Howard is not able to be there right away, and then only the person I've brought with me.
My inlaws (and possibly even my own parents) are likely to be sitting outside in the waiting room. On the chance I do need an emergency Cesarean, please do not tell them until afterwards.
The Cord: At this point, Howard is undecided if he wants to cut the cord, and is leaning towards not cutting it. However, please ask him at the appropriate time if he would like to do it.
We are not banking the cord blood. However, we realize that this blood can have great medical use. We are willing to donate this blood in order to help others.
The Unthinkable: In the very small chance that the decision comes up that we must make the choice between my life and the baby's life, my husband and I have decided that, sad as it would be, we would opt to keep me alive.
Postpartum
Weighing, Exams, Etc.: I would like at least one of us there, at least until the baby has been tagged.
Circumcision: As of this point, we have opted not to have our son circumcised. If there is a medical reason for doing so, we are willing to reconsider, but only after discussion.
Feeding: I plan on nursing, and would prefer that the baby is brought to me for all feedings, if possible. I'd prefer this took place as the baby's hunger dictates as opposed to a regular schedule, but I am flexible on this issue, particularly at night.
Rooming In: Assuming a vaginal birth without significant complications, I suspect what I would like is for the baby to be with me during the day, but at night to be taken to the nursery, with the exception of when he needs to be fed.
Length of Hospital Stay: Whatever is normal, advised, and covered by insurance.
Moms and medical type people: is there anything I'm missing? Anything I should include? Anything you can look at me and say "you're absolutely bonkers"? Anything I DON'T need to include? I'm pretty flexible with my birth plan. What it really amounts to is "get my baby here safely." (Heh. I read this one book called "Diary of a Mad Mom-to-be", and the quote was "Amy's birth plan: Short. Painless.") I know I need to show it to Howard, but any other thoughts from people who've been there?
Thanks!
My general thoughts on giving birth and how I want it handled are very, very simple: you are the doctor and nurses. You are the ones who know how to do this. You tell me what to do, and I will do it. IVs, monitoring, oxytocin, Cesarean, episiotomy, forceps… you know best.
As for the more optional aspects:
Drugs: Right now, I am very hesitant to have an epidural. This is simply because having a needle in my back scares me half to death- more than the actual birthing process does (as do catheters). However, ask me in the middle of labor. I have no moral or ethical objections to pain relief, and I suspect my fear will be overcome by pain. What I say in labor is my real answer.
However, the only sort of pain relief I want is an epidural. Please, nothing that plays with my mind- I want to be cognizant for the delivery. (Unless, of course, there is some other medical reason that I need other forms of pain medication.)
General movement: If I have not had an epidural, I would like to be able to move about, if possible.
Delivery position: If at all possible, I'd really like to be able to grab on to something aside from my husband's hand (in order to save his hand). In the videos they showed us, one woman was kind of gripping/clinging to a bar that went over her bed. I'm not sure that that's possible, but if it is, that might be more comfortable for me.
Mirror Use: Please ask us then!
People in the room: Since this is my first, I would prefer that no interns (nursing or doctor) observe this birth. The fewer people, the better. As far as non-medical personnel, the ONLY person I want in the room is my husband, Howard. I would like this to be the case until I am cleaned up and, if the baby needs to be fed right away, until the first feeding is done. The only exception to this is if Howard is not able to be there right away, and then only the person I've brought with me.
My inlaws (and possibly even my own parents) are likely to be sitting outside in the waiting room. On the chance I do need an emergency Cesarean, please do not tell them until afterwards.
The Cord: At this point, Howard is undecided if he wants to cut the cord, and is leaning towards not cutting it. However, please ask him at the appropriate time if he would like to do it.
We are not banking the cord blood. However, we realize that this blood can have great medical use. We are willing to donate this blood in order to help others.
The Unthinkable: In the very small chance that the decision comes up that we must make the choice between my life and the baby's life, my husband and I have decided that, sad as it would be, we would opt to keep me alive.
Postpartum
Weighing, Exams, Etc.: I would like at least one of us there, at least until the baby has been tagged.
Circumcision: As of this point, we have opted not to have our son circumcised. If there is a medical reason for doing so, we are willing to reconsider, but only after discussion.
Feeding: I plan on nursing, and would prefer that the baby is brought to me for all feedings, if possible. I'd prefer this took place as the baby's hunger dictates as opposed to a regular schedule, but I am flexible on this issue, particularly at night.
Rooming In: Assuming a vaginal birth without significant complications, I suspect what I would like is for the baby to be with me during the day, but at night to be taken to the nursery, with the exception of when he needs to be fed.
Length of Hospital Stay: Whatever is normal, advised, and covered by insurance.
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no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 03:55 pm (UTC)I've heard of something called a walking epidural that you might consider checking into, if you haven't already. I don't know much about it myself (childless, so far) but the impression I've gotten is that it provides a slightly lesser degree of pain relief than a regular epidural but allows most women (not all) to continue to be able to move if they wish to. I've also heard, though, that for liability reasons, some hospitals won't let you move anyway, which in a way, I can understand, but also aargh. My mom, who did admittedly have very easy births and never felt the need for an epidural, has told me that she felt much more comfortable when she was allowed to move around and labor in non-traditional positions. I believe she gave birth to my sister and brother on her hands and knees - her uterus is titled to the back to an unusual degree and that is where she was most comfortable.
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 04:48 pm (UTC)My mom also had easy births, which is kind of why I'm hoping I can get away without an epidural. I was her first, and she had me in 8 hours from the very first contraction to delivery, which is fast. Plus, I have wide hips, high muscle pain tolerance, and a lot of endurance. The cards are pretty stacked in my favor :)
thanks for the response!
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 05:21 pm (UTC)Sounds like it! Best wishes! :)
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Date: 2005-11-01 04:18 pm (UTC)Since I had 3 C-Sections, I had 3 epidurals. If it's just the idea of a needle bugging you, I can't offer much comfort about that. However, I can tell you that the insertion did not hurt me -- it was a pinprick of pain, then a tremendous amount of pressure. It was uncomfortable. But then the drugs flow and you feel nothing at the site of the needle. So, basically, five minutes of discomfort. Of course, I doubt they turn the juice up as high for a vaginal birth, I don't know.
I suspect what I would like is for the baby to be with me during the day, but at night to be taken to the nursery, with the exception of when he needs to be fed.
This is what I did, and it worked well. I even sent them to the nursery during the day occasionally when they were fed if I really felt the need for a snooze. I just told the nurses to bring them back when they were hungry. Believe me, you'll have plenty of time to spend every single second with them when you are home and feeling better.
I would like at least one of us there, at least until the baby has been tagged.
My husband was present for all of that each time. The hospital staff encouraged it, actually.
Let me just say that you are oh so much more organized for your first than I ever could have hoped to be! I never even thought of making up a plan.
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 04:45 pm (UTC)Believe me, you'll have plenty of time to spend every single second with them when you are home and feeling better.
This is EXACTLY why I want to do the partial rooming! :) My friends from work advised me that I might feel like a terrible mother for doing it, but getting some sleep makes a lot of difference.
Thanks for the thoughts and sharing your experiences! (I wouldn't have thought of a plan, either, except I've got a book that advised it. I know the doctors don't really like What to Expect when You're Expecting, but I haven't found it alarmist at all.)
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 04:24 pm (UTC)The important thing about any birth plan is--be *flexible*. Things may change more quickly than you think.
The other important thing about labor and birth is to trust in your body. Your body will tell you when something's wrong, sometimes even when the doctors and nurses say everything's OK. If something feels wrong, *insist* it be checked out. Don't be afraid to speak out. Don't be afraid to have Howard speak out.
What about length of labor? How far do you want to go if it's slow, before you have oxytocin to help it along? (Some labors can go past 48 hours. Here you need to know--what's your endurance and stamina?)
My own preference re pain was to avoid drugs when possible. Epidurals weren't an option with mine--anesthetists were short-staffed, so we were told, don't expect epidurals. I had nitrous oxide with the older, and morphine with the younger. Morphine is all right, as long as you're not pushing. Epidurals can prolong labor, because you may not recognize the contractions. Not that I'm trying to convince you not to have one. Just--be aware of the risks and benefits.
Re episiotomies--they're finding now that they're not helpful and may cause worse tearing. Do you know your delivering OB's policy on them?
What about fetal monitoring if you don't have an epidural?
Re feeding--the baby won't be rooming-in with you all the time? Both of mine roomed in with me, and went to the nursery only for their nightly weighins. Just my opinion but for breastfeeding it might be better to have him room in so you can get used to his "I'm hungry!" cues all the time. Babies should go no longer than 3 hours between feedings in the day, and 5 at night. That's for your sake too, because your breasts produce on demand. Trust me, engorgement is *not* fun.
Have you thought about pacifier use? Pacifiers and bottle nipples confuse the baby because the sucking action is different. It's far less work than breastfeeding, but it's the sucking from breastfeeding that promotes optimal jaw development. I would humbly suggest--no supplemental feedings, and no pacifiers while in hospital. If you will bottle-feed eventually, don't introduce it until baby's about 6 weeks old and has perfected breastfeeding. (This is another reason to have baby room-in all the time--so they can't sneak a supplemental feeding without you knowing. It does happen.)
What about pain relief post-partum? The first baby isn't so bad so you should be OK, but the second one--afterpains are like labor. :-| I'd avoid Tylenol with codeine (though they may offer it) because the codeine will make baby sleepy. Depends on your level of pain tolerance.
Re length of hospital stay--be very careful. Do you know what your insurance covers? They now recommend a minimum 24-hour stay even for uncomplicated births, and 48 hours is better. (I got to stay 72 hours with mine so that feeding was established, but I live in Canada so YMMV.) If your insurance only covers "drive-through" births--i.e. you stay like only 6 hours and then get booted out--uh, no. Insist on a minimum 24 hours--for safety, not just comfort. This is especially important for the baby because some conditions like jaundice don't develop for a few days. A baby's temperature doesn't stabilize for about 24-48 hours.
So-my nosy opinions. :-) Do with as you will.
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Date: 2005-11-01 04:41 pm (UTC)Just--be aware of the risks and benefits.
Yup. I've done a lot of research on this one. My mom had very easy labors, so that's actually part of why I'm reluctant to say "I want the epidural"- she gave birth to me (her first) in 8 hours. (I also have wide hips and great endurance and a pretty high tolerance to muscle pain.)
Do you know your delivering OB's policy on them?
Heheheh- believe me- that's one of the first things I asked!!! :) If the idea of a needle in my back scares me, the idea of someone coming at my pelvic region with what amounts to a pair of hedgeclippers terrifies me even more! My OB's policy- and the hospital's policy- on episiotamies is "only if absolutely necessary", so that was taken into account when I said they pretty much had free reign.
Re feeding--the baby won't be rooming-in with you all the time?
Yeah, this was on advice from several mothers I talked to. Having him in during the day gives you a chance to begin to get to know him, but having him in the nursery at night gives you a better chance to sleep and recover. The philosophy behind that was you have plenty of time to get used to his cues after... but you won't get to sleep. (And from what I've been told, after giving birth...)
I hadn't thought about post-partum pain relief at all. Thanks!
Do you know what your insurance covers?
Yup- we checked :) My insurance, the doctor's policy, and the hospital's policy is 48 hours for a vaginal birth without complications, 4 days for a Cesarean without complications. People can leave after 24 hours (they don't like you to leave before that), but they prefer you stay the full 48.
Thanks so much for your thoughts- especially since there were things I hadn't thought of!
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 05:19 pm (UTC)When you put it that way--(cringes). I had the episiotomy with the first (along with vacuum extraction--I swear, we had to *smoke* her out! I'd tell you the whole story but I don't know if you want to hear it, heh) but not with the second.
You mean you're still sleeping through the night now? I'm impressed. With #2, I was up every 3 hours just to hit the bathroom right through the pregnancy. That was my body's way of prepping me for nighttime feedings. Except #2 is almost 4 and I still wake up every few hours... :-(
Good to hear about the insurance. I'm feeling better now. :-) The one thing I remember after each birth, was how pumped I felt. I was tired, sure, but I was exhilarated.
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Date: 2005-11-01 06:07 pm (UTC)Nope- I'm not sleeping through the night. I get up at least twice (generally around 2 and 5), and my thighs are KILLING me. (It feels like I strained the groin muscles at some point, and it hurts my thighs to turn over.) But I've heard a lot of people say they're just exhausted after the birth, and getting that little extra sleep in the hospital helps get over the birthing process.
And I've been very diligent on checking what our insurance covers! :) (However, I did alter my plan a bit to flat-out state 48 hours for a vaginal, 4 days for a C-section. Better to do it than not!)
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 04:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 05:25 pm (UTC)One other thing, in labor--keep that bladder empty. And those bowels. Because they will hinder progress of the baby. (Though don't be surprised if you void during pushing. Yes, TMI--but then again, you won't care. Just so you know.)
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Date: 2005-11-01 06:10 pm (UTC)And I have to giggle at the second, because I've actually asked a few people if that happened to them. That was one of my worst fears. I told Howard that it was, and fortunately, he laughed at me and said not to worry about it (because it's really HIS opinion that I'm worried about. Things you don't want your husband to see you doing, y'know?) He was really good about reassuring me that it would be no big deal. (I don't think he wants to be watching from that direction much anyway.)
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 06:32 pm (UTC)May I ask--what brand of pump? (I'm also nosy!) There are good ones and terrible ones. Medela and Avent are the best. They cost more but are well worth it. You don't want a cheap pump, you can injure your breasts.
Actually, teeth are no problem. (#1 nursed for 10 months till I went back to work, #2 nursed for 2.5 years.) Once they take the first nip at your breast (they don't really mean to hurt, they're just testing out the choppers anyway), gently but firmly push their face into your breast for a second or two. After a couple of times they learn very quickly that chomping on Mommy's breast is *wrong*. Some people confuse baby's fussiness with teething with wanting to wean. That's not necessarily true. But if you want to wean once he has teeth--why not? He'll have had most of the benefits after 6-7 months.
Umm--re labor, delivery and the voiding question--my hubby would say--Howard won't *want* to be watching that direction anyway. Not for the voiding (he didn't care either)--but for the gore. So you may want to re-think the mirror. :-)
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 07:44 pm (UTC)Nice to know how to deal with teeth. I honestly have no positive idea what I'll do once he gets that old, but I like to pretend I do :)
And LOL! The mirror is actually not for Howard, but for me. I think I might like to see a bit- at least when the baby's head is crowning. And that's also why I'm telling them "ask." It's something that we may or may not want... and I'm happy to go with whatever seems to work at that point in time!
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 04:46 pm (UTC)It looks like a very good birth plan. Good for you for preparing this, and also for preparing yourself for what you're going to face. Giving birth's quite the process.
I know you've likely heard this before -- I did, and laughed, before I'd birthed the square-headed Big Boy of Doom -- but once you're actually in the delivery room, it's likely you won't give a flying rat's patoot about big needles or who's there. Epidurals are a wonderful thing. I'd said I didn't want one, but eight hours into the induction, I nearly kissed the anesthesiologist when he showed up. (BTW -- it feels like a bee sting, and once the needle's out, which takes about three seconds, you're catheterized into the spine and you can lay back and breathe, and start cracking bad jokes in the sudden absence of pain. You also may end up being catheterized for your bladder, epidural or not; the trauma of birthing sometimes makes the whole nether region lose sensation. Catheters scared the daylights out of me as well, but they're nearly painless and not as bad as you'd expect.)
For the birthing position, if you've been given an epidural, you'll likely be holding the backs of your thighs as you push. (And you won't feel a darn thing, LOL.) I delivered one of my children without meds, and I held onto the side rails of the bed, which worked really well, and saved DH's hands besides.
Once you're laboring, it's like being on a rollercoaster, and the ride doesn't end till...well...Uh, should I tell you my oldest turns five tomorrow and I'm still not off the ride? LOL
You'll be amazed at your own body. Your self-image will likely change once you've had your baby. I'd been freaked out about losing weight after the baby arrived, but once I had my sweet boy, I realized that if my body could push out eight pounds of human being, I'd cut it some slack. ;D
Good for you for choosing to nurse! Breastfeeding can be difficult the first few weeks, especially for a first baby, but if you can hang in there, you'll be glad you did. (Then again, if you need to switch to bottle-feeding, whether pumping or formula, as long as Baby's healthy, it's all good.) If your hospital has a lactation consultant, GET HER IN THERE!!!, and don't be shy about asking a nurse to help you to latch on or position the baby. Rooming-in will help, but don't be surprised if you don't sleep well, whether Baby's there or not. If you can stay in the hospital till your milk comes in, DO SO!!!, because it's a whole different ball game, then. And your boobs will look like cantaloupes.
If you'd ever like to talk, e me at heartsncraftslb at aol dot com, or throw me a line at Ye Olde LJ. Best of luck! - LB
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 04:56 pm (UTC)I have heard that about epidurals- that once you're there... forget fear, just give me the drugs! I won't be at all surprised if that happens to me. I guess the biggest reason I'm reluctant is my mom- she had very easy births, and if I follow suit I'd rather go without the epidural. (At least, so I think. Ask me again when I'm in labor ;) )
You'll be amazed at your own body. Your self-image will likely change once you've had your baby. I'd been freaked out about losing weight after the baby arrived, but once I had my sweet boy, I realized that if my body could push out eight pounds of human being, I'd cut it some slack. ;D
It's really interesting- and relevant!- that you bring this up, because I have major issues with my weight and really want to lose some when the baby is here. I should probably lose about 20 pounds just for my health anyway, but the point about cutting myself some slack is one that hopefully I will listen to you on. I'm really, really bad about that on this particular subject!
(Then again, if you need to switch to bottle-feeding, whether pumping or formula, as long as Baby's healthy, it's all good.)
I'm actually planning on doing this- pumping and nursing together- so I have a little more freedom and so hubby can help feed ;)
If your hospital has a lactation consultant, GET HER IN THERE!!!
Oh yeah. My best friend at work is a lactation consultant sort of person (volunteer, not professional), and she's given me the low-down on this sort of thing.
Thanks so much for your response! :)
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 04:50 pm (UTC)General Movement: Don't be surprised if once they hook you up to the monitors, they'll be very reluctant to let you walk around.
Rooming In: I found the situation you are asking for to be the perfect solution so that my husband and I actually got some sleep.
Feeding: Just remember that while breast-feeding is natural, it's not instinctual. If you don't have a close female friend or relative to ask questions of, ask every damn nurse or lactation consultant you can find. When your milk comes in, remember that you can pump to release some of the pressure to help the baby latch on. And if once in a while, you have to give a little formula to be able to sleep through the night, don't feel guilty. Baby will be just fine.
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 06:16 pm (UTC)Thanks for the info on feeding, too. I don't have a close female relative to really ask questions from- my mom of course did formula (because that's what you did back when she had us, no questions asked) and my sis doesn't have kids yet. Any little tidbits of info are really, really good to know!
THanks for the reply!
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 05:33 pm (UTC)I had an epidural both times. I won't lie to you, having it hurt, but my god, afterwards was great! I just felt mildly inebriated for the rest of the birth - I even slept for a couple of hours during the first one! I still felt when I needed to push (it was like being desperate for a huge poo!), so didn't feel like I had no control or anything. Also, the anaesthetist was skilled, so it just started to wear off as the babies were born - meaning I was up and about shortly afterwards.
Secondly, once you actually get to pushing, I promise you you won't give two hoots who's there gawping at your lady-bits. Honestly. They could have been doing guided tours to local builders and I wouldn't have noticed... Brace yourself, love, once you have given birth all sense of dignity, humiliation and embarrassemt just goes totally out of the window.
I hope I haven't frightened you too much, and I hope your birth goes as you want it to - it can't be long now, can it? The very best of luck to you!
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 06:25 pm (UTC)It's really good to hear everyone's stories on epidurals, because I'm simply scared of them. The more I hear about them, the more it eases my fear, y'know? And having people sing their praises.... :)
My sis told me to put in the bit about the interns, more because the more people in the room, the less intimate the experience. The thing about my in-laws isn't actually modesty. It's simply I want the birth to just be me and hubby. My in-laws were actually under the impression that they'd be in the birthing room with us, and I know that as soon as they hear I'm in labor, they will come to the hospital. (They don't live far away.) I REALLY don't want them to. Not just because I want it to be me and Howard and that's it, but because my in-laws- especially my father in law- worry obsessively. I want to be able to scream and swear and anything else I damn well please without them being ready to call the minister for my last rites, and if I DO need an emergency C-section, my father-in-law will be ready to pick out my casket. (Sadly, I'm not joking about this.) I can't do anything about them coming to the hospital- for their sake, I wish they wouldn't! Stay home! Be comfortable! (My parents live further away, so I'm less worried about them.) But I really, really, really want that time to be just me and Howard.
You haven't frightened me at all, and as long as the baby and I come out healthy the other end, it went as I wanted :) And yup- 3.5 weeks to the D-date! (Of course, I don't expect him to actually OBSERVE the due date, but there ya go :) ) Thanks so much for the reply!
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 05:43 pm (UTC)2. Where you wrote, "You tell me what to do", you might want to change that to "You tell me what I need to do" or "...what has to be done..." because otherwise, you might have some optional things done that aren't necessary. Very few doctors, for example, say that episiotomies are necessary unless they're also using forceps, and believe me, you want to avoid that!
3. One thing you *need* to change is "However, the only sort of pain relief I want is an epidural..." You need to change this to "The only sort of pain relief I want during a vaginal delivery is an epidural, and if stiching is required afterwards, please, please, please use a local anesthetic." Even when I had no epidural for Harry, I was very happy to have my local for the stitching afterwards.
4. When Catie crowned, I got to touch her head. It was iggy and stick and so so damned cool, and I am glad I did it, even though in the prior labours I really Did Not Want To. Consider it.
5. If you're planning on nursing, you might want to add into the postpartum section that you want the baby placed on your chest for initial tests, and so he has a chance to nurse before they take him for tests and weighing; at the very least, he should be able to stay in your room for 30 to 60 minutes before he goes for bathing and monitoring.
If I've given you more questions, please ask!
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 06:30 pm (UTC)See, this especially is why I am very, very glad I have such a wonderful f-list and I posted this on LJ. I didn't think of this, and already I could kiss your feet for mentioning it, even if I am several weeks from the birth. THANK YOU.
Interesting about needing your own kit to donate cord blood. I'll have to look into that. We've decided not to bank just because it's so expensive, and even if the kid DOES have a problem there's no guarantee he can use his own blood, but I know the blood is very valuable for other patients. You'd think they'd make donating as easy as possible. Interesting.
Thanks for all the info- ESPECIALLY the bit about local anesthetic, which is something that so should in there!!!!!
no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 06:07 pm (UTC)As for the content. Hmm, there's a big gap between no pain relief and an epidural. I mostly used entonox (gas and air) which was brilliant, although it isn't great for everyone, but the advantage is that if you don't like it, you just need to stop using it, and the effects wear off in about a minute. Does the hospital have a birthing pool and qualified staff? A few of my friends found water the best pain relief during labour (none of them gave birth in the pool), so that's another 'no head mess' alternative.
You might want to think about how the placenta will be delivered. I elected to have an injection (I think it was called syntometrin?) to make it easier/safer, and then insisted on having the midwife pull it out anyway.
I also had to decide whether I wanted the baby to have a vitamin K injection at birth, or receive oral doses, so I don't know if you need to think about that (in Britain policy varies between NHS trusts so maybe it's something completely diffferent where you are.)
Also, in my experience it doesn't do to be too laid back about letting medical staff perform episitomies, stitching etc--they're far too keen on them for my liking. Tell them they have to ask you first. They were all set to stitch me up after birth but I interrupted the midwives (discussing with each other just how many stitches to put in!) and said I'd prefer not to unless it was really necessary. They conceded it wasn't, and I recovered more quickly and painlessly than any of my bestitched sisters. Same for episiotomies. I'm not saying don't have them, but make sure you get asked beforehand, don't just let them think they can do what they like to you.
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Date: 2005-11-01 06:35 pm (UTC)Heh. I'm not. My thing is I need a plan. It doesn't matter if nothing on it happens (although I think most of what I want is pretty standard)... I just need a plan for my peace of mind to start with.
I REALLY wish the hospital had a birthing pool. Sadly, it doesn't. I asked, because water is a huge help to me any time I have muscle pain. We have a nice, deep, jacuzzi tub right now (not a hot tub- just one of the tubs with the jets), and I use it just about every night at a warm-but-not-too-hot temperature to help with various muscle aches. I SO wish that the hospital did, but none of them around here do.
I hadn't thought about the placenta at ALL, or how the vitamin K should be administered, so thanks for those suggestions! And Heidi also mentioned the episiodomies, so I've already altered the plan to make it clear that I don't want one unless it's necessary. (My OB is fairly against them anyway, which is a good thing.)
Thanks so much for the reply!
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Date: 2005-11-01 06:48 pm (UTC)I'm so excited for you, though! Getting close!
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Date: 2005-11-03 11:05 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-11-01 08:09 pm (UTC)I have this crazy image of lupinslittleinlaws wringing their hands and demandnig to be let in or part of the decision like my mom's folks were with the boys. It's kind of amusing actually. The situations in which people are willing to knock over a medical proffesional. Hehe.
I don't have any actual help though, so I'm sorry for cluttering up your thread. Will keep you in my thoughts though.
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Date: 2005-11-03 11:10 pm (UTC)My MIL (I love the term lupinslittleinlaws!) had an operation to correct a hernia infection back in December. There was some reason to be scared, but she got past the danger point pretty quickly. Well after she was past it, they still had her on some pretty strong painkillers- she was doped up on Demerol and the like. Of course, they really played with her mind. Add to that the fact that time has no meaning in a hospital because every day seems much the same (no real weekends or nights!), and then she asked what time it was (6:00) and couldn't tell if it was morning or night (it was December- they look a lot alike!), and my FIL just totally freaked out. He was convinced she was dying at that point, and in tears and all because he was positive she was losing her mind. No, at that point she was well beyond the danger- she was just on Demerol. I know it's really stressful for him to have to watch his wife go through this, but at the same time... you can see why I'd be worried he's ready to pick out matching coffins for me and the baby if I need a C-section. He's definitely melodramatic. So it's actually for HIS sake that I don't want them told until afterwards if I need a C-section- not mine! :)
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Date: 2005-11-02 12:24 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-11-03 11:12 pm (UTC)